So this is a bit of a random topic- but it's been on my mind all day and I've wanted to write about it, so I'm going to take the time and lay out my thoughts here. I'm hitting on a kind of rough topic, so bare with me.
In the past, I've used quotes about how you cannot help someone who doesn't want to get better- how you can try and try to save them, but no matter how much effort you put in... they'll still fall into the abyss because they themselves didn't want the help. I think that this particularly rings true for people with therapists. When you see a therapist, it is on you to tell them everything. They're there to help you, it's their profession to handle whatever problems you may throw at them. However, if you aren't telling your therapist everything, they won't be able to fully help you- in fact, by giving them information that you've picked and chosen, they may make your situation worse un-knowingly. I feel like most people go into therapy with the intent of getting better... but also thinking that they know everything about themselves. They think they know their own problems, so instead of telling their therapist everything... they focus only on what they believe to be the problem (even though there may be far more underlying problems). Due to misconstrued information, I strongly believe many people are misdiagnosed. The scary thing about misdiagnosis is that you can be put on some really strong and addicting medications to treat something you may not even have... simply because you didn't tell the trained professional everything. This being said, if you sincerely do not wish to get better, even a psychologist cannot help you. If you don't tell the person everything, chances are you will be misdiagnosed... and that can screw you up for life. Please be honest with your therapist. - Maddie
0 Comments
I have a lot of movies that I like. I like Tom & Jerry, The Jungle Bunch, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and Brave. In Tom and Jerry, Tom tries to destroy Jerry. He always fails! It is really funny!
The Jungle Bunch are funny too. In the first movie, a penguin with tiger stripes needs to save other penguins from losing their eggs, and food.The penguin with stripes tries to stop all of the walruses from taking over. In the turtles movie, a guy named Shredder is trying to destroy the turtles. In Brave, the main character's mother is turned into a bear. Ashleigh Today's blog post is going to be a bit different than usual; because I'm writing it while I'm out and without a real set topic!!! I have a lot to get done today before my friend comes over, so I figured I'd write this before I even got back to the house so I wouldn't have to deal with TOO much stress. I still have some algebra, another post, AND my vacuuming to take care of.
However, my caffeine addiction knows no bounds and even with this heavy schedule I still asked my dad to take me out for our routine cup of coffee during the day. I really enjoy the coffee; but more than the coffee I enjoy the time spent in the truck with my dad talking about whatever we happen to come up with. Usually, we end up talking about life or some such engrossing topic- in fact; we just started talking about how life could possibly be a computer simulation!!! Talks like these are why my dad and I are so close. He doesn't have any real limits and he never "grew up" in the ways that DON'T matter- so he doesn't mind talking about whatever and making jokes with me. It's pretty awesome, to be honest. I feel like most people say that they "never grew up", but so many say it without knowing what it means. How close are you to your kids, if you have them? Can you relate to them and help them and talk about the world with them? Or would you rather blame them for your own mistakes and categorize them into the generation they were born without choice into. My dad can not only level with me on most things; but he tries to take interest in the things that I'm interested in as well. Hell, he even took up karate to help me train when I was 7; never knowing that he'd enjoy it! He's now a second degree black belt and a sensei. Aside from that; he also hikes with me and my sister, plays xbox with us, watches anime with me, and even tries to fit in with "meme" culture (which can be a mix of embarrassing and amusing to me). He's a great dad and he has a great connection with me... and in today's world, I couldn't be more thankful. - maddie
I don't know if any of you have ever sat down and read Aesop's fables, but if you have, then you know it is a great source for quotes. Today, I am going to put down a number of quotes that relate to my life in some way at this moment.
Now, there are literally hundreds of quotes that you can can get from Aesop's Fables. Below are only a few that I can relate to lately. Next week, it could very well be a different set! Think of the quotes in Aesop's as the modern-day I-Ching! I now list some quotes in no specific order. Later in the week, I will write about some of the quotes and how they relate to me in more detail.
Well, there are twenty different quotes for you. Don't just read these quotes. Think about them, and how they may play a part in your own life. The quotes above relate to things happening in the world around me. Some of them should have specific lessons for specific people, while the others pertain to general observations to what is happening in the world around us. Over the next couple of weeks, I will come back to these quotes and write on some of them individually (In between some of my other posts, since sometimes an idea is too good to not share immediately!).
"When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but creatures of emotion." That's a quote by Dale Carnegie. Best known for his book "How To Win Friends & Influence People" Carnegie was an expert at... well making friends and influencing people!
I think this quote is spot on. In fact, I see it in action nearly every day as I watch my family's daily interactions. When the bickering and nattering start, I notice that throwing a little logic into the mix usually ends in one of two results. One the person that is being forced to see the logic in an argument is usually stumped. Once the logic in a course of action is shown, there usually isn't a way to win the argument so it just stops. The second way I have seen things go is when the one piece of logic is refuted by another bit of logic. These are usually the fun ones to watch since both arguments are logical. There was an old saying that all roads lead to Rome. Well, in some cases, there are more than one logical way to reach a conclusion! Regardless of what people say, we all react emotionally at one point or another. The trick is to recognize when a decision you are making is driven by emotion and to then try to find the logical way to justify your decision. I find that if you can't logically justify your position, then you are likely better off making a different decision. I try to teach my daughters to think logically. Maddie, unfortunately, uses logic as a weapon to win arguments. This is okay, as far as it goes, but I think she also needs to use logic in areas of her life where her emotions are ruling the roost. All decisions are better when they can lead to a logical conclusion. Now, I am not just pointing fingers at Maddie here. I too, have made some bad decisions when I relied too heavily on my emotions. In fact, looking back at my life, I would say that a large percentage of time where I got into some trouble, it was either when I let my emotions guide my actions, or when I just didn't think my actions out to the most logical conclusion. All said, the point of this post is that if you want to make better day-to-day decisions in your life, then you need to start to think logically... even when your emotions are telling you otherwise. Think through your actions people. I believe strongly that your life will be better because of it. Do all things end with their logical conclusions? No. Many times you will find that they don't. Even so, if you act logically, you will have a better chance of seeing a positive outcome. Not everyone will be thinking logically, though, and unfortunately, that is where some of your problems will lie. If you can judge who is acting from emotions only and not bringing things to their logical conclusion, you can sometimes still find a way to avoid a disaster by seeking ways to counter the illogical action. Life is a lot of times like a game of chess. Keep an eye on the key pieces and make your moves logically! Well, we are back from our vacation and had a wonderful time. Over the next few days, we will have the blog back up to full speed again. Carrying a camera with you all the time really lets you see what you have been missing each day! I do not mean that my life is lacking when I am not on vacation. No, I mean that sometimes we need to slow down in life and actually take pictures of what we see every day. What is ordinary to one person may just be the little bit of extraordinary that someone else needs in their life. I think that as I go through my day I am going to start to take more pictures of what to me is ordinary and share them to you. Over the past two weeks we have received more visitors to this site than in any other week. While I like to think that what we write is interesting, I think many people may just be looking around for interesting things to see. If you live in San Francisco or the Rockies, then our pictures likely weren't that special to you. Meanwhile, if you live elsewhere, you may have found them very interesting. I am more of a reader than a sightseer though. When I look at web sites, I am usually looking for something interesting to read. I hop you are too. With that said, I do find pictures can help to make what you are saying more interesting. Thus I will try to incorporate more pictures into my posts going forward. That does not mean I will be cutting back on my writing. Instead, I will try to add a picture here and there to illustrate my points. Although people say that "you can't teach an old dog new tricks." This old dog is going to try and learn some new tricks over the net couple of weeks. Let me know what you think after a few weeks! To that end, Here are two pictures. The first shows what I will be doing for the next few minutes, while the second is the view from my front door. Enjoy! That final pick is of a sunset on Contoocook Lake taken by Maddie back in February. Every day should have some beauty in it. There is some for you, if you are having a tough day!
On Tuesday we leave on a cross-country train trip.I have always wanted my daughters to see the country, and I could think of no better way to do it than by taking the train coast to coast.
We leave from Boston on early Tuesday morning, and arrive in California Friday evening. Over the course of our trip we will see some of the prettiest shorelines in the U.S. On Tuesday, we'll start in Boston and travel through the Berkshires, eventually stopping in Albany. We'll switch trains there and roll through the Finger Lakes region of upstate New York. The train parallels the Eerie canal for a stretch and then rolls along the Mohawk River. Finally, we'll travel along the south shore of Lake Michigan right up into Chicago. In Chicago, we switch trains and then it's off to California on the California Zephyr, which is known as one of the most beautiful train trips in all of North America! After passing through the great plains, the train will go up through the Rocky Mountains and then ramble on through the Sierra Nevadas. On Friday we will eventually pull in to Emeryville California and a short bus trip into San Francisco. We'll stay in San Francisco until Tuesday morning, and then fly back to New Hampshire. Needless to say, over the next week, we'll be posting a lot of pictures from as we cross the United States, and give our thoughts on the trip. Bon Voyage readers! Our traveling posts will start on Tuesday. " We do not know enough about the unknown to know that it is unknowable.” That is a quote from G.K. Chesterton. He was an English writer that George Bernard Shaw once called a colossal genius. Overall, he seems to be known for his quotes more than anything else.
I like the quote above because it is simple and true. Just because something isn't known now, doesn't mean that it is unknowable... it just means that at this moment we don't know enough about it to say it is known. Take space flight, for example. For thousands of years man could not leave the earth's atmosphere. In effect, how to do it was unknown. Yet as we progressed as a species, more and more became known about flight and eventually we made it to the moon. While it was unknowable for much of human history. The secret of leaving earth's atmosphere is now known today. I think that eventually man will make it to other planets. Within my lifetime, I am hoping to see man land on Mars. Eventually, I believe man will eventually visit other star systems. What is unknowable today will likely someday become known. And that is just one example! Think about the advances in medicine we have seen in just the past 150 years. Or the changes in technology since the early 1980's! Man has the uncanny ability to, as a race, build on our past knowledge. I believe that in the future, a lot of what is currently not known, will become common knowledge at some point. Not so much about our past... but unknowns about the human body, the mind, human potential and the physical sciences. I hope I am alive to experience much of it! Tonight, I am writing about the sky. Sometimes it is dark, and I can see stars. Sometimes it is blue, and I go outside to play. Sometimes it is gray and it starts to rain.
Ashleigh PS - Photo credit goes to my sister Maddie, who takes some amazing photos. Who am I? Who am I?
It's something I can ask myself all day I fit into so many contradicting categories Because I cannot just choose one way That would be silly, I'm constantly changing! In life, we are expected to make choices- Good and bad, black and white Which side are you on, what are your preferences There is no shade of grey, no purgatory between heaven and hell on Earth. I suppose I can't wear black and appreciate flowers, Because I don't dress the part I look harsh; therefore I am taken as harsh I cannot appreciate simple things. Fighting is not looked upon as an art. But on the other hand~ I can't dress in flowing dresses, and be able to defend myself I cannot get a tattoo and dress classy at the same time For they are two separate categories And I am expected to choose I am 14, and of course all these decisions likely seem silly Unimportant, because I am so young But even this young, in today's society I am expected to choose a category A category that has been branded by my own generation Am I a hipster, a hippy, an emo, a goth, a punk, a nerd Where do I fit? Do I like heavy metal or techno, or maybe rap, or pop, or classical? Do I prefer leather to lace, or do I like soft cotton? Stilettos, combat boots, sandals or sneakers Jeans or skirts Dresses or band tees In today's world, no trends can coincide You choose your style, and your preferences are supposed to fall into line Because no one expects someone with neon hair and a lip ring to sit in a music hall listening to symphonies Or you choose your preferences, and your style is assigned... because what metalhead would wear conservative and prude clothing Society has set expectations for preference and it bothers me Because now I'm confused I like so many things that seem to contradict the presets of society And I don't know where I belong So I drift where my personality takes me It just makes me feel odd Knowing that some will look at the length of my eyeliner And place me into one category Whereas others may see my tee-shirts and place me in another When I belong to no true category And only those who take the time to speak to me And get past whatever appearance I happen to take on any given day Will know who I really am. I know this post was disjointed and weird... but this is just a collection of my thoughts structured in a different way. It's late and I'm tired; and this is just what came out naturally. It's not really a poem; but not entirely a post either. You decide. Make what you will of it. My point is simple: appearance shouldn't define you and societies norms shouldn't shove you into preferences. Don't be mainstream. Think for yourself. Break the mold. -- Maddie Have you ever listened to a song with a happy and light beat and a cheerful tone, and then listened to the lyrics to discover that they are miserable or dark at best? I play music while I work often, and I use Spotify to do so. I put it on shuffle and let it run through. A moment ago, the song 'Fun' by Troye Sivan came on, and I noticed a certain message in it that I wanted to speak about. So, below are the lyrics and before you read my opinion; think about what YOU think it means. I think it's pretty self-explanatory.
But don't you wanna see the world, boy All the countries and the stars, boy Just don't look them in the eyes, boy You just gotta take their lives, boy Let me take you for a drive, boy Oh I swear you'll feel alive, boy All you gotta do is trust that I'm being true And do it for the people who love you Let's go have fun, you and me in the old Jeep Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat Fun, you and me in the Middle East Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday sun You and me in the old Jeep Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat Fun, you and me in the Middle East Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday sun Listen to what I tell you You'll see, my son Now you know what you gotta do Let's go have fun When you're standing on the line, boy Don't go looking for goodbye, boy Yeah, you gotta set them free, boy 'Cause you know that's what they need, boy Yeah, you're gonna make them proud, boy 'Til they put you in the ground, boy All you gotta do is trust that I'm being true And do it for the people who love you Let's go have fun, you and me in the old Jeep Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat Fun, you and me in the Middle East Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday sun, You and me in the old Jeep Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat Fun, you and me in the Middle East Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday sun Listen to what I tell you You'll see, my son Now you know what you gotta do Let's go have fun Let's go have fun Let's go have fun, you and me in the old Jeep Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat Fun, you and me in the Middle East Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday sun You and me in the old Jeep Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat Fun, you and me in the Middle East Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday sun Fun, you and me in the old Jeep, Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat Fun, you and me in the Middle East Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday sun You and me in the old Jeep Ride around town with our rifles on the front seat Fun, you and me in the Middle East Shooting at rocks, bullets cocked in the midday sun I think the song is clearly speaking about war. And while the song may get a bit repetitive; I'd like to dwell on the first verse a bit. It is literally talking about the delusion that the world offers up as glory for fighting in wars. They give the false image that you will get to see new places and that it will be thrilling; and that you'll be seen as a hero... but at the same time, to mindlessly follow order. "Just don't look them in the eyes, boy. You just gotta take their lives, boy". Don't look too close, don't see the truth. Just kill without reason. "All you gotta do is trust that I'm being true, and do it for the people who love you." Honestly, the message of being seen as a hero is strong in this song and it's sad because in today's world, it's true. Anyone Jo Shmo who goes off to the Army is automatically made out to be some kind of hero... and I'm sorry, but I just don't see it. Call me young, immature, or anything else, but in my opinion signing your life away in your most vital years where you could, I don't know, be getting a college degree or starting a family, is extremely foolish. Even worse, the cause for which you sign your life away! To go invade a country for monetary reasons; or for some non-renewable energy source... I don't see how anyone is still buying that. Have we not learned where war has left us in the past? Apparently not. I don't know where I was even going with this... I just think the country is manipulated; particularly the youth who think that the Army is the desired life. You may be seen as a hero; but do you really want to be known as a hero for supporting a corrupt cause? It's rather bittersweet, isn't it. We go to war to find peace and agreement. And that is every bit as bittersweet. - Maddie “You don't get explanations in real life. You just get moments that are absolutely, utterly, inexplicably odd.” Okay, I am going with something completely different today. That quote is by Neil Gaiman. Who is Neil Gaiman? you might ask. Well, thank God for Wikipedia... I didn't know either until I looked him up. He is a pretty well regarded author actually. He has won the Bram Stoker award, a Hugo, a Nebula, a Newbery and a Carnegie award for his writing. Not Bad! With all of those awards, someone must have read his stuff!
There are two types of writing in the world... fiction and nonfiction. Each type takes its own skills. To write fiction well, you need to be creative. I mean think about it, often times you are creating your own world, or at a minimum, new people to inhabit worlds people already know. I find it absolutely amazing when someone can take me away from this world and actually make me see another world of their own creation. In my opinion it is just as impressive to write nonfiction. With nonfiction you are using your analytical and research skills to tell a story that may not be obvious to everyone. You are also oftentimes taking the mundane and trying to make it exciting... or at least exciting enough for someone to keep reading about it. Gaiman writes fiction. To get back to his quote, I agree with it totally. Life can be and usually is a collection of inexplicably odd moments. These are what we remember fondly, anyway. I don't know about you, but I rarely remember what I had for dinner on any given day more than two days back. I eat dinner every day, yet I really can't remember any of those meals because they all run together. No need for an explanation there! Yet I remember vividly little odd things that have happened to me along with the major moments of my life. My life has been filled with odd moments. So odd in fact, that I don't really know where to begin. I couldn't tell you all of them anyway. They float into my mind, make me smile, and then float out again. I just thought of two that I have no explanation for. Why they happened? Who knows, they just did. The first one that comes to mind was that I once partied with a coven of witches in Philadelphia. Originally, my friend and I were going to Philly to hang out with his sister. Little did we know that his sister hung out with self-proclaimed witches. You never would have known that any of them were witches. A few of them were cute, and the others were average looking. I kept asking one of the cuties to put a hex on me, but that only led to her spiking my drink with an illegal substance. It was an interesting evening! No explanation ever came for why they were witches. I didn't really care. As long as we weren't going to become human sacrifices, I was okay to party with them. The night went by without incident, although I must say that we met a number of weird characters that evening. Oddly enough, these girls went to Temple, and that school's mascot is an owl. How fitting that these witches were going to Temple and rooting for owls! No explanations here! Just relating an odd moment from my past. The second odd moment that came to mind happened in the Hampton's in New York. When I was younger, a bunch of us used to rent a bungalow out on the beach during the summer. It was funny, there were people walking in and out of that bungalow all of the time, and half of the time I had no clue who the people were. We would all invite friends up for the weekend, so it wasn't surprising that there could be thirty people hanging out in the yard or house at any given time... and you might know maybe half of them. The time that really sticks out to me though was one day when me and a friend of mine were just hanging on the beach drinking beers. Neither one of us was going in the water, we were just standing there talking when all of a sudden, one of the girls from the party going on at the house came running up and said "hey come on let's go swimming and ran by us and went into the surf. We just stood there and watched her for a couple of minutes and she would yell "come on in, the water is fine!" and other such nonsense. We were content to drink our beers since neither one of us was really into her. Well, the next thing you know, the girl whipped off her bikini top and yelled "Hey guys come on! Hello!!!" Well, you know we both just looked at each other in disbelief, dropped our beers and went in the water! I still don't know that girl's name, although we hung out with her the rest of the day and me and her sang with the band later that night. (Just for the record, they shut our mike off after the first thirty seconds or so. We were THAT bad! Thank God we were friends with some of the guys in the band, they let us stay up there for a song or two before asking us to go back in the crowd.) So anyway, there are a couple of odd moments in my life without explanation. There are one or two more that involve shouting mazel tov! at inappropriate times, or allowing drunk friends to chase garbage trucks down Lexington Avenue in the early morning hours after they mistakenly identify them as buses. These too, deserve no explanations. Anyway, odd moments bring color to our lives. Tell me some of your odd moments, and I will tell you who you are. Or more exactly, who you were. We all change. The odd moments I have now have nothing to do with drinking or partying. They involve my daughters and their thoughts and hopes, and the moments we spend together. Fishing, hiking, karate and learning make for a much better combination than booze and cigars for making my odd moments nowadays. There are many sounds in the world. I like the sound of birds singing. I also like the sound
of a bee buzzing. I hate the sound of an electric knife! Ashleigh |
Archives
September 2021
Categories
All
|