Yes, you read that correctly- I don't identify love. All of my friends are at the age where they are getting into relationships and crooning over their significant other, holding hands, kissing and calling it love. While I have a boyfriend... I don't identify love because I believe it is impossible to know what it is at such a young age.
I'm 13, almost 14. I see this as a time for me to explore my interests and see what traits I like in people and date around, trying different types of people. Am I tied down? No, not in any way! I stay loyal in relationships, but I won't stay in them if I have a stronger attraction to someone else because in my eyes, that's wrong. I don't want to connect myself so deeply to someone this young where if we breakup, I'll end up hurt like some of my friends. While I see dating at this age as this sort of "trial run", I have other friends who have only been in one relationship and after a rocky breakup, say they will never love again. No... Stop... You're FOURTEEN. Some douchebag you weren't even dating for a full year should not impact you that much. Yes, I get it, you "loved" him... But was it really love if it wasn't reciprocated? He left, didn't he? That isn't love... And that is what makes me question if love even CAN be defined. I think everyone will know it, TRULY know it, when they find it... And I think everyone has to define it for themselves. I honestly don't think that love can even BE defined until engagement or marriage, and even then there is the potential that a person could leave... So maybe we will never know. A lot of people live in an illusion of love, thinking that it is just the outlying obvious shows of affection that make it what society has sculpted it into. But from what I've seen so far in my short lifespan, love is when you would give your all for what's best for the one you love. You protect them and support them; but don't let them damage themselves. And most importantly perhaps, I think love is being able to talk about literally anything and not getting frustrated with each other. That's about as far as I've gotten with "love". And I can tell you now that I won't know what it really is for a while.... And I won't claim to before I do. To my friends- go on, get into short-term relationships... Believe it is love, and tear yourselves down when it doesn't work out. I guess it's just a learning process. ~Maddie
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