"There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it." That is a quote by Edith Wharton. Best known nowadays for her book The Age Of Innocence, few know that prior to her marriage she was known as Pussy Jones. Get your mind out of the gutter! Back then, Pussy had no derogatory meaning. Still, I thought it would be good to add that for a modern chuckle. I guess I watched too much Beavis & Butthead when I was younger. "huh, huh, huh... he said pussy!"
Anyway, to get back to the quote, there are obviously more ways to spread light than candles and mirrors. In her day, these were the two best ways to spread light. But I think the light she was talking about was happiness. Happiness is something we can all spread with a little practice. A smile, a kind word, a little extra effort in anything you do. All can help to make life a little happier for the people around you. So many people go through life spreading discord, stress and grief. How much better would life be if everyone tried to spread happiness? My daughters symbolized the discord today in the car. Both girls sat in the back of the car today on the way back from church. Ashleigh would say something and Maddie would jump on her, telling her to shut up and that she was silly. Ashleigh would then do and say things to annoy Maddie. How much nicer the ride would have been if Maddie would have found something nice to say to her sister. Instead of trying to bring happiness to her young sister, she is subconsciously teaching her that she has nothing of value to say and that if she continues to speak Maddie will make her unhappy. In a way, Maddie is teaching her sister to be unhappy, as she is, rather than to chase happiness. Overall, Ashleigh is an innocent child, and very happy. Sometimes, happiness can be threatening for those who are not happy since it threatens their view that the world is overall an unhappy place. For me, it is the little things in life that make happiness. While no one can always be happy, we can look for happiness, and if we cannot find it for ourselves, we can always try to help others find it. A comment like "I like the way you did your hair this morning", or even just a smile or a tap on the hand can bring happiness to people. I guess what I am trying to say is that if we can't find happiness for ourselves in a given moment, isn't it nice t know that maybe we have helped someone else to attain it? I know that in those times when I actually know I made someone else happy, I usually feel a little better myself. I also know that when someone goes out of their way to say something nice to me, I remember it for a long time. Here is a good case in point. Back in April of last year, I met a woman to sell her one of my wife's old pocketbooks. We stood and spoke for a few minutes and then both went on our way. I had told her about what happened with my wife and how me and my daughters were dealing with it, home schooling the girls, and working from home. When I got back from the trip there was a message for me from the woman. it said: " You are one of the most inspiring, endearing and interesting people I've ever met! Good luck to you and your family! Sounds like everyone is on the right path!! Have a blessed day!!" I must say that that message made me feel good. I always get a bit down speaking about my wife, so I was feeling a bit down by the time I got back, but that message was enough to make me feel a bit better. The message was unexpected but gave me a nice pick me up! How much better I felt after reading it. It was unexpected, and I am sure that that woman couldn't know how much that little text message lifted my spirits that morning... and at other times when I remembered about it. Indeed, I remembered it just now as I was writing this post and went back and found it to quote it here. A kind word can go a long way towards making someone's day. That text only took that woman a moment to write, and yet it did so much to make me feel better that week. It was so much nicer than telling someone to keep quiet because they have absolutely nothing to say that you want to hear! Words have power folks. Think about what you say... and how you say it. If you are unhappy, tired or hurting, does it in anyway make you feel better to make someone else feel that way as well? If you say yes, then you are trying to defend the defenseless. Be a light to others in your sphere of influence. If you can't be a light, then be a mirror. Just don't, whatever you do, be a well of darkness. Life is just too short. If you can't say something nice, then just say nothing at all. Sometimes silence can suffice.
1 Comment
Maddie
3/14/2016 08:43:02 pm
I'm sorry that you don't fully comprehend what goes on in the back seat of the car. I hate being poked, prodded, kicked and shoved and the snide words she says just to piss me off don't help and THAT is when I tell her to shut up. Thanks for labeling me as the well of darkness tho lol
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