This quote is quite interesting to me because it is another metaphor- and a really good one; at that. I believe it references how people can universally be looking at the same thing; but everyone will see it differently. In a way, it makes a lot of sense- that everyone would find something different about certain scenarios. Using the stars as an example can only go so far- the stars are countless and it would be crazy if everyone only saw the one same star universally.
I also believe that varied points of view are essential in life. Things can't always be one-sided- different ideas and perspectives give greater insight onto most situations. If everyone saw things the same way and constantly agreed; I could only imagine that life would be boring. There would be no conflict at all- and while some may see this as a good thing; I believe that conflict has a place in the world to make things interesting. People who questioned nothing would essentially just be drones. That being said; I think it is amazing that we as a species are creative enough to all "look at the same stars" and see so many different things. I think our many different perspectives are brilliant; something to be appreciated... not frowned upon. Too many people are sensitive because someone doesn't exactly agree with their opinion. I try not to be like that- I'll hear someone out before giving them my full opinion. It is only when people over-react to change or difference that negative conflict is created. Don't be the cause of negative conflict. -- Maddie
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Following my dad's theme; I am going to select 2 "deep' questions and give my answers to them. If you'd like, you too can answer them and leave your own response in the comments below. I personally would love to read them.
If you died today, what regrets would you have about your life? Honestly; I try to live without regrets. In my eyes, everything I do is done for a reason. I am a big believer in fate, that everything is set to happen in a certain way and work out in the end. Everything in the world is linked together in some small, weird, or inconsequential way- and due to all these connections; everything has a way of working out in the end. While I'm sure that there are obvious better alternative ending situations to some scenarios... life only happens once; and therefore we can only IMAGINE what the better could have been. There is no guarantee. And since there is no guarantee that any different action would have resulted in a better alternative; I try to not regret my choices. What are the highest and lowest points in your life? I'd say some of the highest points in my life are when I am with my dad. He and I always have very deep and inspirational talks- and he is a very close friend to me on top of being a parental figure. I can always pluck a lesson from our conversations; and he's always there to make me feel better when I'm down without a doubt. He offers good advice and unique perspectives without the bias of not wanting me mad at him. He's honest, with good morals that he constantly tries to teach me and I can't think of enough of a way to thank him for all he does for me. My lowest points in life come in cycles of depression, unfortunately- but I think that occurs in everyone's life. Stars can't shine without darkness and rainbows can't happen without rain, you know? In any case, that wraps up today's post- I hope you enjoyed. - Maddie I read an article earlier today that had all sorts of questions on it. It was titled: Deep Conversation Topics. Many of the questions were very personal and something you would likely not answer truthfully unless you were very comfortable with the person asking you the question. Even so, there were a few soft ball questions that I think anyone would openly answer. Below, I will ask and answer a couple of questions. If you disagree with my answer, then write in and give your point of view. With that said, here we go!
"If you were given an envelope with the time and date of your death inside, would you open it? I thought this was a rather silly question since it could never happen, unless the person was going to murder you right then. Otherwise, there is no way anyone could know for certain. Still, just to pay along with the nonsense, I will give it an honest answer as if it could happen. I would open the envelope. Why? Because I would like to take the week off before my death just to get all my affairs in order so that my daughters wouldn't have to do it, and so that I could spend some extra quality time with them. if it said I was dying young, I would also take out extra insurance so that my daughters would be very well off after I died (ha ha). Moreover, if my death was still a long ways off, I would make sure to start knocking things off my bucket list of things to do before I die a little more quickly. In hindsight, isn't that what we should be doing anyway? Trying to experience life to its fullest before it is too late. While I realize the question is stupid on the surface, it does make you see the error of your ways if you are not living your life to its fullest. In that regard, it was a good question. So what will you do now, to make your life a little more lively before you die? Personally, I am slated to do one of the things I have always wanted to do this summer. I am taking my girls on a cross-country train trip starting in Boston and finishing in San Francisco. I used to be a rail stock analyst and on a number of occasions I went on train trips with the railroads on "track inspection" tours. Usually, these tours were in the southern United States. I always enjoyed them and thought that a trip across the entire country would lead to some great scenery and a pleasant trip. I want my girls to see the country, and not just see cities that they fly to, thus I decided this was a great way to have them see the country, while also fulfilling one of my little dreams too. I am looking forward to the trip, and for the first time in a long time I actually can't wait for the trip to begin! "Who are you really? Who is behind the mask that you show to the rest of the world?" Ah, here is a question that I think everyone really has trouble with. We all wear many masks depending on either who we are with, or where we are, or what we are doing. No, you say? You are always the same. I honestly doubt that. Let me give you some examples. When you are in a church, do you act differently than when you are outside of it? Are you quieter in the church? How do you act in front of your boss compared to how you act with friends that you have known for years? Do you act differently at home then you do when you are out? I think the answers are a resounding Yes! And it's okay! We all need to show restraint at times... it's normal! But, whether it is normal or not, the truth is that some people only know a caricature of our true selves. Sometimes, we even fool ourselves. Here is a perfect example. I am an introvert. At the same time, I can be very sociable. When I was younger, I was afraid that people would think I was strange and a loner if I was too quiet. Thus, I forced myself to go talk to people and try to make them laugh. I did this so much, that most people, including my oldest daughter, think I am an extrovert. And, to look at it from their point of view, I certainly do look like an extrovert... when I am out in public. When I am home, I am happiest just being around my family. I can stay in the house for days on end without ever feeling the need to go out. In fact, I am happy to just let the phone ring sometimes and not answer it. Certainly not the actions of an extrovert! So what is behind your mask? I am an introvert. I am very observant and I am a thinker. In fact, sometimes I likely overthink things. By trade I am a stock analyst. It is a great profession for me because I like to think logically, and look at how things are related. I analyze everything in my life and the environment around me. Analyzing a stock is just an extension of my personality really. When I was younger, I would jokingly tell people I am an opinionated guy and people pay me for my opinion. That line always got a good chuckle, but after a few years, I began to realize that the statement was entirely true. So what other masks do I wear? Father, son, sensei analyst, friend, worker and friendly person. I wear them all interchangeably. With some people, I am like Janus, and they get to see me with more than one mask. With others, I am opaque, and they really have no sense of who I truly am. With myself? I am a bit of a mystery. I see the many masks that I put on, and while I hope I know the true face that is underneath, sometimes I even surprise myself with what is really inside. Last one: "What is holding you back from being the person you truly want to be?" Oh, the answer to this one is easy really. On the surface at least. What is holding me back? Fear. Not a physical fear and not a fear in all aspects of my life, but fear is the answer anyway. Fear of how I will be perceived by others, and particularly the ones I love. I try not to let the fear stop me from being who I am, but every once in a while, something will come out of nowhere and make me think about something in my life. Here is a recent example. This may get a little lengthy because I think I need to explain a little about my past and my present. In the past, I worked as a stock analyst in New York for a number of different firms. Oftentimes I had to wear expensive suits because I would be meeting with management teams or other analysts and I was expected to look successful at all times. For about twenty years, I had to wear suits fairly regularly, although not every day. When I started my own business, I did not have to wear suits often since a lot of my work was done at home on the computer. I began to dress comfortably, which to me, means in a jeans and a Tee shirt. One social worker who was working with me and Sharon noted that I was always in jeans and a tee and pointed out to me that it was like my uniform. When I said that I could wear whatever I liked, she said yes, and yet you choose to wear jeans and a Tee shirt... at least every time that I see you. She said: "in your mind you see the very casual dress as a badge of your success. You no longer dress up to impress people. Instead you dress down and you like to leave people wondering how is it you can do what you like, even though you dress worse than they do." I thought about what she said for a long time. And I think she was partially right. I think she was partially right because I do wear my tee shirt and jeans as a kind of uniform. It is a uniform that reminds me that I control my own destiny. I never really thought about what others were thinking about me, but what I was thinking to myself that I was free to dress as I wanted. Well the other day, I was speaking with my daughter and she told me that the car I drove rather finished off my white trash persona. Now, I never thought that I put off a "white trash" persona, but I guess to my daughter and her friends I do. Tee shirts and jeans somehow must be frowned upon nowadays. I really think that no one who takes a moment to speak with me thinks that I am white trash. I do drive an old clunky car. It was my wife's car when she died, and I started driving it. I am not ready to get rid of it yet, so whether it is a rust bucket or not, I will be driving it for a while. My truck is also older. It is a 1992, to be honest. Up until last year, it was my plow truck only, and never came off of the property. Now, I occasionally drive it around. Oddly enough, I have always driven used cars. They do not lose 20% of their value the minute you drive them off the lot, and I can usually pay cash for them. One rule of thumb that I have is to never borrow money on a depreciating asset. If that makes me white trash, then so be it. I guess I would rather be considered white trash than to borrow money to buy a new car that will lose value the minute I drive it off of the lot. I am totally debt free. No car loan, no student loan debt, no mortgage and no credit card debt. There are very few in this country that can say that. I have worked hard for everything that I have and I don't feel the need to show it off. If it makes someone feel good to have a new car, that's great. They can have it. For me, a car is a tool. It gets me from point A to point B. It says nothing about my personality, whether it is white, red, or even pink. I don't care whether it is a Ford or a Chevy, an Isuzu, or a Honda. I just care whether or not it is reliable for what I need it for. I leave keeping up with the Jones' for others to play. In the end, I am who I have wanted to be... a good father and a collector of memories and small moments. When I die, the old Blazer or pick up truck will not be coming with me. Hopefully, my memories will. If not, at a minimum I will be happy if I can leave some happy memories for my daughters. And when they think of me, they will look past the tee shirt and the jeans and see me for who I really am, and not just as their caricature of white trash. The fear is there, though. Today I'm going to talk about bugs. I hate bugs except the daddy long legs. I have a book about bugs it is called ''Lets Look At Bugs''. It has pictures of bugs such as spiders, beetles and earth worms. The book tells me what all of the bugs look like.
Ashleigh I love this quote so much- it's such an accurate metaphor. In fact; I don't think I've ever found a better metaphor for it. It's always been a question in the back of my mind- what is death like? I know for a fact I'm not alone in wondering this- but the thought of death has never truly scared me. And trust me, it's not because I feel like there's anything for certain after death- because I don't. I don't think what comes after death is anything that we humans could ever predict.
But does that scare me? NO! If anything, it just further intrigues me. What happens to us after we die always has; in a way. When I was little, I remember I used to fear death a LOT. I used to fear my own death, and the death of my parents and those I cared about. After experiencing the death of one parent... I guess you could say the fear kind of washed away. It was replaced by acceptance- that death happens to all of us eventually and that there's not shit to be done about it. While we can prolong our lives, we can't stay immortal. I was once asked by a friend "what kills us and what makes us eternal". While I replied soundly that almost everything kills us without much shock, my friend gasped when I told her I thought that nothing could make us eternal. She asked why I would think such a thing; and my reply was somewhere along the lines of a quote from The Fault In Our Stars- about how oblivion is inevitable and that someday, there won't be any humans left to even remember the greatest historical figures; let alone wandering souls. Thus; not even our memories that get carried on through loved ones can make us eternal. I'd like to finish this post with a little tie up; and a final quote that I like. At the end of the day- I don't fear death and never will again. It's unavoidable; after all- so worrying about it will only make the one life I know I've been given more miserable than it has to be. "We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death trembles to take us." - Maddie Tonight I read a long book called ''Christopher Robin Gives Pooh a Party''. Christopher Robin was giving a party for pooh because of what Pooh did for Piglet. He saved him from the flood. After the party, his friend Christopher Robin gave him a gift; A pencil case with blue, red, and green pencils.
Ashleigh "People don't want to hear the truth, because they don't want their illusions destroyed." That's a quote by Friedrich Nietzsche. I am going to assume you all know a little about Friedrich, that way I don't have to bore you with a run down on his life and thoughts.
One thing I will say, is that although many people seem to think his writing was popular with the Nazis, this really isn't so. You see, in his later years he had lost his mental faculties and was taken care of by his family. After his death in 1900, his sister took control of his writings and reworking Nietzsche's unpublished writings to fit her own German nationalist ideology while often contradicting or obfuscating his stated opinions, which were explicitly opposed to antisemitism and nationalism. That's what Wikipedia has to say on the subject anyway! As for the above quote, I think Nietzsche was spot on. There are a number of truths that people just don't want to hear nowadays, because it doesn't fit with their illusions. It's important to note that not all people are opposed to all truths, but that if enough people are opposed to any given truth, they will do their best to shout down anyone who opposes their belief. Below, are some things that I see as fundamentally true that people don't want to hear.
Okay, that's enough. I think you get the idea. There are a lot more truths out there. Write some in a comment and send them to me. If they aren't too bad, maybe I will post them in a follow up post. So far, I have had zero responses to my requests for thoughts on the different posts I write. I don't blame you really. I rarely respond to other people's requests either. We all have a lot to do, I realize. I find it kind of cool that 160 separate people read our blog last week, and that we have been averaging over 140 people a week for the past few weeks. If you like what you see, tell others about it. We have fun writing the blog and it is a homeschooling project for both of my daughters. So we'll keep writing whether you respond or not. Good night folks! Tonight, I am writing about the sky. Sometimes it is dark, and I can see stars. Sometimes it is blue, and I go outside to play. Sometimes it is gray and it starts to rain.
Ashleigh PS - Photo credit goes to my sister Maddie, who takes some amazing photos. Earlier, my little sister wrote a post about the sky and it really intrigued some deep thoughts for me. Her topic was quite simple; as was what she wrote- but how she wrote it provoked my mind a bit. She wrote about how the sky could be bright blue and pretty, and how it could be many colors, and finally how it could be gray and cloudy. I automatically began relating the sky to life, and the many "colors" of life- or, emotions you experience going through life.
You have regular days, where the sky is a bright happy blue- a good day, an average day that the sun shines brightly down upon. Some days, the bright happy blue of normality fades into a darker, much more somber blue- symbolizing seriousness, perhaps even sorrow of a type. Darker days also come and pass from time to time, bringing rainclouds to pour down onto earth. This is symbolic for depression; which weaves in and out of the lives of many. There are often bright, colorful sunset splashes on the sky at the end of the day- proof that even the darkest days can have great beauty. On rare days, you'll even catch a rainbow in the sky- as the rainy day and the rays of sunlight collide. I'd like to think of this as a symbol for becoming happy in the worst of times. Now this post may seem short or inconsequential- but if so, it means you didn't read into it. I want you to take this one moment and think deeply about your own life. Picture it as being the sky... what does your sky look like? Is it a colorful splash of sunsets and rainbows with only small patches of gray here and there; or is it an eternal raincloud... at the end of the day; you are the only one who truly knows the beauty (or lack thereof) of your own sky and you are the only one capable of changing it. Please... create a beautiful skyscape for yourself. Don't let pain bring you down. -- Maddie "Be Weird. Be Random. Be Who You Are. Because You Never Know Who Would Love The Person You Hide." Okay, so I found this quote on a poster (above) and I have no clue who said it. Given the picture of the cat, it was probably a hippy. And that's okay.
As I have gotten older, I have found more and more to like about the hippy movement. Make love not war? I'm all for it! Equal rights? Yep, nothing wrong with that either. How about: Leave things better than you found it? That works for me also! Okay, so after that last paragraph you might ask: Well, aren't things okay?" Yes, and that's the problem. Being "okay" is not the same as being happy. But okay is not bad enough for anyone to care either! "Okay" means just more of the same shit. Which brings me back to the original quote. Don't pretend to be something you are not, or someone who is really the opposite of your nature. I would think that this will only end badly. Remember, people are drawn to people who are similar to them. If you pretend to be someone you are not, you will likely attract someone who is very different than who you truly are. Meanwhile, if you always act as you truly are, you are more likely to attract someone who is really like you, and who will love you for who you are. Or, of course, you could attract someone who is pretending to be like you truly are, which could also be a problem. In the end, honesty is the best policy. Be who you are. Be open to meeting new people and listen to what they say. Sometimes, it is easier to see with your ears and your heart. If you honestly want your life to be real, then don't be an illusion to others. |
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