Ever hear the phrase "Life's a game!"? It really is. No matter what you decide to do in life, there is competition and more importantly decisions to be made. Although not every decision leads to a life or death situation, some do. And any decision you make could change the course of your life. When I was younger, I had a friend who left a job at UPS to go work for a small fog light manufacturer with an office in New Jersey. The job didn't pay well, but when the company decided to open a plant in Georgia and close their New Jersey office, he decided to move with the job to Georgia. At the time I couldn't understand his decision. The company was a German manufacturer, so he was essentially moving from one satellite office to another...for the same low pay.
What I had failed to see was that he was moving to get a jump start on a new life. Without a college education, Jersey holds little appeal for a manual laborer without a lot of drive. Your pay is low, while your taxes and cost of living are high. To make matters worse, the type of house you can buy while making less than $50,000 a year are appallingly small and old. In hindsight, my friend was moving to improve his prospects in life. Regardless how much he made, his cost of living dropped dramatically, and he got a chance to create a new life for himself where no one knew him. Essentially, he could move down there and be whoever he wanted to be. No one would question his actions if his style of dress changed or if how he acted changed. In essence he took a chance to start over. Well played dude! Have you ever ran into someone you knew in high school or some other time frame in your life who didn't seem to change at all? How sad. I have met a number of people like that. They live in the past. They say hello and the first thing out of their mouth is "hey, do you remember that time...(and add your own stupid story)". When I run into someone I haven't seen in a while, I like to find out how they are doing now...not what drunken foolishness they did twenty years ago. Living in the past is a bad life move. There is so much out there to see and do. No need to relive the past over and over again. Yet we all do it. For myself, I think of my dead wife often. Nothing I can do can bring her back. By thinking of her, I sometimes feel like I hold myself back from meeting new people. No, I am not talking about getting married again. At this point, I have no desire to.At the same time, I do like to meet new people and do fun things. By living in the past, I sometimes feel like I steal from the present and limit my future. Like it or not, life is a game. Everything you do can make it a happy game, or a sad game. A healthy game or a deadly one. Not moving forward with your life is similar to skipping a turn. Life is very short. The best advice I can give you...or myself, is to not skip any turns. Life if for the living! Take some chances to improve your situation. To my daughters: Smile at the boy you like! Have a kind word for everyone. Avoid people you don't like...even if, and especially if you don't know why you don't like them. Life is a game, play smart and be happy.
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I open the door of my garage, and am greeted by cool air and a smell of gasoline. As I step barefoot onto the floor, I am greeted by a cold, smooth surface. I press the button to open the garage door, and as it creaks open, I stop for a few seconds to punch the hanging bag. I then continue out the door. As I step across the threshold of the garage, my feet step onto the gravel. It digs into my feet and hurts a little bit, but I don't mind. The pain will go away as I begin to walk.
My dog spots me from across the yard, and runs over to me. He is already panting, telling me that he has already been out running in the woods, chasing after a scent or whatever else he may have found. I took a running head start towards the first small hill on my driveway. The air was warm, but not so hot that I wanted to rip my skin off... it was about 60 degrees out, and perfect weather for just... being outside. Not doing anything in particular, just relaxing. The wind catches my hair as I run up the hill. By now, my feet are stinging from the gravel... but I don't mind. As I keep going, the stinging numbs down, just in time for me to reach the top of the hill. Now, there's a bit of the driveway that is flat and shady... I go over into a patch of shade and lie down. I stare up at the sky, watching the clouds moving by slowly. It's a good way to unwind and think. I get up after a few minutes and continue my walk. I finally reach where I was headed to begin with- a large rock alongside the driveway that I love to sit on. It is shaded by a tall pine tree, and provides a good place to sit and think even more. I step onto the soft, cold dirt and walk up to my rock. I sit cross-legged and think even more, letting the breeze (which has grown colder now) wipe away all my worries... letting any negative thoughts go completely. I wait 5 minutes, and then head back. As I walk through the garage doors once again, this time with my tired dog at my heels panting... I smile. It's only been ten minutes- but it was ten minutes of happiness, ten minutes of peace, ten minutes TO MYSELF. I recommend that EVERYONE take some time off like this every now and again... it is truly wonderful thing and a great stress reliever. Maddie I just read an article on the internet that made me think about my own life a bit. The woman in the article spoke about giving up a $95,000 a year job in Manhattan to buy a one-way ticket to St. Johns in the Caribbean. When she left, she had no job to go to and knew no one on the island. She ended up selling ice cream at an ice cream parlor for $10 an hour. No, I have no plans to up and move to the islands! What made me think of my life was my decision to eschew a corporate job and start my own business...and then move to New Hampshire, well away from the financial capital of the world where most of my contacts worked. Similar to the woman in the article, my wife and I knew no one in New Hampshire. Unlike the woman in the article, we didn't give up the cash for our move...I lost that later! I must say that the move to New Hampshire was within the top five things that I have done in my life (my daughters are the best thing I have ever done!). The environment is beautiful, the people are nice, and we get to experience the best of all four seasons! That's a picture we took from the top of one of the local mountains. I truly can't imagine a more beautiful area to live in!
Anyway, back to the story. Sometimes a move can be just what the doctor ordered. I know that when we moved, we wanted to move somewhere that was less crowded and had a lower tax rate. We also wanted to make sure that where ever we moved, we wanted to have cable internet service so that I could conduct my business over the internet. As far as we planned, our plan worked! Sharon's illness was the curve ball I didn't see coming...we'll leave that for another blog post. For this post, I'd just like to say that the woman in the article I read transformed her life. She wasn't happy in Manhattan and felt like she was just spinning her wheels. She wanted her life to become simpler. We all have our own paths to follow. In the end, sometimes I think that following your heart isn't necessarily a bad thing. Just make sure that you use your head too. Dreams can come true, if you plan your way there. I like cats. I don,t like that they scratch, though.Cats are soft and cuddly.My Dad is allergic to cats. He does not like them!
Ashleigh I recently finished reading the book "Looking For Alaska" by John Green. It was a romance/comedy novel, as are all of his books- but going through it, I found a lot of quotes I really liked and I wanted to highlight. Since I don't believe in writing in books and I'm too lazy to write the quotes down on paper, I figured, "Why not turn my favorite quotes into a blog post?!" So without further ado... here are my favorite quotes from Looking For Alaska.
Today, Ashleigh and I are pretty much on our own. Grandma went in for another lens replacement surgery on her eye, and she won't be able to see out of that eye for roughly a week. Because of this, I am stuck with most of the chores such as laundry, bed-making, cooking, cleaning etc. Today, it begins... I have to make lunch for everyone. Not too hard of a task- especially since I like cooking. I am currently boiling water and making mac and cheese with ham for lunch.
There we go! Lunch finished. I think I did pretty good- the mac and cheese came out well, and we ate our deli ham before hand. Now, we're tucking into some brownies I made from scratch yesterday. It was my first time using the recipe, and I was quite surprised at how moist and sweet the brownies were. In fact, I'd like to share the recipe with you: You Will Need: 4 oz Baker's Unsweetened Chocolate (coarsely chopped) 3/4 cup butter 2 cups sugar 3 eggs 1 tsp vanilla 1 cup flour Prep: Heat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Line 13x9 inch pan with foil, with extra foil to extend over the edges. Spray foil with cooking spray. Microwave chocolate and butter in a large microwavable bowl on high for 2 minutes, OR until all the butter is melted. Stir until the chocolate is completely melted. Stir in sugar. Blend in eggs and vanilla. Add flour and mix well, then pour into the prepared pan. Bake for 30-35 minutes, or until toothpick comes out clean when brownies are tested. Cut, serve... and enjoy! Maddie Although many people dream of working from home full time, I can tell you from experience that there are some downsides to it. The biggest negative is that you never know when people are not in. Working from home you end up having to rely on people to get your reports to the editor...or if there is a problem with your page you need the production guys around to fix up your page. If any one cog in the machine is missing, you end up with headaches.
Today, there was a key person missing in production and two of my stocks are still waiting to be galleyed. This wouldn't be too bad if I wasn't waiting since Friday on one of the two! I work on the weekends and I was trying to get the one stock prepped to work on. Now, I have had the writing edited, I have all of my numbers done, but I have a page showing the format for last year! Oy! You would think that they would have more than one person who can handle production problems! Nope, out of the three people in the department, only one can fix problems Another thing that is tough is that you never get to develop camaraderie with the people you work with. I still have friends that I originally met at Value Line from when I worked there in the early 1990's. This time through, while I can recognize some of the names, I think I would have a tough time picking most of them out in a crowd. The old timers, yes I recognize them. But anyone who started in the past ten years is hit or miss. Overall, I have to admit that I like working from home.I get to really know my daughters in a way that just wasn't available to my Dad when me and my sister were growing up. In fact, I suspect many parents nowadays just don't get to experience true parenting. When I reflect on what I am doing...I have to say I am happy. Are things perfect? No, I could be making more money. I can stand to lose a few pounds...but overall, I am doing what I was put on this earth to do. Raise my children to the best of my abilities. My family is good at baking and cooking. Maddie made brownies today. I tasted one, and I liked it very, very, very much! I want to learn how to bake too. Baking is fun!
Ashleigh Do you know what I don't understand? People who hate other people for no reason whatsoever. It annoys the crap out of me... especially when it happens to me. Recently, one girl HAS pretty much been saying she "hates" me... and I don't know why.
I've never talked to her. Or texted her. I don't even know who she is. She's a friend of one of my friends, and ever since we started talking... my friends (who I've known for 4+ years) say that she "hates" me. Because I apparently take up too much of her friend's time. Look... I can't help that! It's HIS CHOICE to talk to whoever he wants, whenever he wants. Neither of us can control that... I've never said anything to or about her, so she really has no valid reason to hate me! Since I found out, I've tried talking to her to settle things and try to make peace... all she does is pretend, say things are fine when they clearly aren't, and then go talk shit behind my back anyway. There's no help for it. I don't know what to do, and I don't think there is anything I CAN do. I've said I'm here if she ever wants to talk, and that I don't hate her and all of that... because really, I don't. I don't know who she is, and she's given me no reason to hate her... she just annoys me. If you're going to hate me, I do not care. But at LEAST have a valid reason. Maddie Today, I want to talk about change... and how it is always happening. My inspiration for this post is my friend, who recently was having a tough time dealing with changes (mainly in his friends) in his life. He has been getting stressed out about it, and I just wanted to write this as almost a clarification.
Change happens constantly. To all of us... particularly our friends, over the years. Hell, in a WEEK you can notice change in your friends. No one stays the same forever, and as time goes on, you WILL find yourself drifting away from your friends. People make their own choices in life... choices that are THEIRS and not yours to control. You make your own choices as well, and with these choices, you will sometimes lose friends. One of my friends began dating a girl, and he lost his best friend because of it... jealousy is one hell of an emotion. However, it was HIS choice to begin dating the girl, and his friend (if she truly was his friend) should not have just ditched him because of it... you don't do that to a friend. It was his choice, not hers, and she made the decision to not have him in her life anymore because of it. Likewise, he made the decision to not make an effort to get her back as a friend. What it comes down to is we all have choices. They are OUR choices, and our's alone... but they often times affect those around us. Before we make a choice, we have to think about ourselves... but also those close to us, because our choices make changes, and change... change affects everyone. Maddie I like toads. Toads hop! In the summer we catch toads. They usually die in the winter. I
can not wait to catch a toad this year! Ashleigh As the headline says, time is a precious commodity. Each one of us is only given so much time on earth...and none of us know exactly how much time we have. I don't like to have my time wasted. Recently, my eldest daughter Madison has been wasting my time by not getting her work in by its deadline. Therefore, I have decided to start wasting her time. From here on out, she has no computer time at all unless I give it to her. Those periods will be very short lived.
She will get time to do her math each day...after I get done putting parental controls on her computer. All of her book reports from now on will be hand written. Once I have read them, she will then have time to put them up on her school work blogs. Time is a precious commodity. Don't waste someone else's! You ever wonder how much of what we perceive is actually true? I do. I also wonder what the "truth" really is anymore. When I was younger, I had a tendency to look at things in black and white. Either something was good, or it was bad. There was no in between. Chocolate was good...asparagus was bad. End of story!
As I got older, things began to change. Chocolate, in my mind still tasted good, but had enough bad qualities, that I no longer wanted to eat it. Meanwhile, asparagus still tasted funny, but it has so many positive attributes that I will usually eat it when it is placed in front of me. It seems that as my knowledge base broadened, so did my ability to see things in shades of grey. To me, although grey is a nice color, and can make some things more palatable, there are some parts of my life where I still only want to see things in black and white. It is easier for me that way. There are currently over 50 volumes of books published by the U.S. government that hold the laws of the United States. I googled the question "How many laws are there in the United States?" No one seems to know. They change all the time is quoted over and over again. To me, this screams one thing. If no one can even say how many laws we have in the U.S., then nobody really knows if they are breaking "the law" at any given time or not. Since no one can say how many laws we have, let alone if they are all just, I have decided to follow my own set of laws. My law is black and white and really simple. Treat others as you yourself want to be treated. That's it. If I follow that rule, then I really shouldn't run afoul of any of the more important federal laws. If you wouldn't want to be stolen from, then don't steal! If you want to be treated civilly, then treat others that way as well. If you give your word about something...then follow through! Life can be that simple! Problems arise when others don't follow these rules. Laws are needed for when people don't follow these rules. These laws can be simple. How are you legally allowed to react when people don't follow these simple tenets? How much force are you allowed to wield in each situation? Yes, I believe laws are necessary, for everyone's protection. Even so, I think they should be there to protect people's property rights, not to protect the government's right to make and enforce arbitrary laws. Is your child not wearing a helmet while riding their bike? So what! It may not be what you or I might do, but the act itself is a victim-less crime. What it comes down to is: should my opinion of what another should be able to do be made into law? Should anyone's opinion? I don't think so. I think all laws should be based on property rights. How to protect everyone's person and property. If a law can't pass this simple test, then it should not be made a law. I have really over simplified things here, but I think that by following my own personal code, I will have few brushes with the law...other than speeding tickets, which I have had a few of over the years. It all comes down to perceptions. I see over 50 volumes of books with laws very few can quote. Or I see one rule to live by with a small set of laws that give permissions to what is allowable in each instance of rule breaking. Let me tell you, we wouldn't need fifty volumes of laws to handle my simple system! I like donuts. Donuts taste good! We have white powder covered donuts. My sister and
I eat donuts. My grandma buys them for us. My dad thinks they are little pucks of poison. Ashleigh Every once in a while I get too busy to think. That is what I feel like today. I have been writing comments and working on spreadsheets since 6:30 this morning. I took a short break to sell some old sweaters to a person over Facebook around 11:00 o'clock, but other than that, it has been strictly business.
Life should be lived at a measured pace. No rushing to get here or there...no rushing to get anywhere. Even though I believe this, I find reality is something different. I work from home, so there is no rushing to get anywhere. Even so, I find I rush around on the computer to cram my head full of information. Read a transcript, a report, a news clipping. Listen to a conference call and jot some notes. All of this work isn't due until next week. Even so, I know I will build the pressure on myself until the work is done. I enjoy my job (usually), so it really doesn't bother me. In fact, I impose the deadlines on myself so that I can get a sense of accomplishment, What sort of deadlines do you set for yourself? I am sure I am not the only one to do so. Whether it is what time we choose to go to bed, or what time we eat dinner, we all dance to some sort of drum. I like to constantly work at getting something accomplished. It makes me feel good. Some people like to work at shirking responsibility. There is a lot of work in that, too. Just work of a different kind. Today, I am busy working. Tomorrow, who knows? There is always something to do if you look for it. The question is: Is it worth doing in the first place? WOW. 3:30 and I still have nothing to blog about... I have to admit, I'm a bit disappointed in myself. Usually I have some good inspiration and I can pump out a blog post easily by this time. Today, however... my mind has been empty. Have you ever had a day like that, where your mind just DOESN'T? If you have, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. Your thoughts are all broken up, you can't carry one idea too far (or at least not far enough to write about it) and you just... can't really function properly. That's what kinda happened to me today.
For the life of me, I can't finish this post! I keep trying different ways to branch it out, but I just CAN'T. My mind wanders and I lose my thought process. Usually I can focus very well, but on rare occasions like today, I can't make sense of anything. My mind jumps from homework to rainbows within a matter of seconds and it drives me crazy. Now, here I am 20 minutes from my deadline, rushing to get my post out with coherent thoughts and over 25 lines of writing. I also need to leave to go to the store... at least this is my last bit of homework for the day. I have to leave now, and I apologize if this post is weird or cut short. I just don't want to be taxed with the penalty of writing a two page paper on a boring subject. Maddie My Daddy works a lot. He works every day. Each night, Daddy and I play with my toys, watch a movie,or play Wizard 101 together. I like to spend time with Daddy!
Ashleigh It is raining today. I like to water color when it rains. Painting is fun! I painted a pony with
rainbow colors! Pink is my favorite color. Ashleigh We all have odd little subconscious fears... it doesn't matter who you are, you have one. Perhaps you find yourself getting paranoid during the day, feeling like you're doing something wrong or like you are being criticized. Or maybe you worry too much, always checking your phone for missed calls from family and friends and keeping tabs on Facebook status updates. Or maybe your subconscious fear isn't something as obvious, or it doesn't present itself in an obvious way. Let me explain.
My Dad, whenever we start selling things on Facebook, has told me that he repetitively will check Facebook to see if anything has sold yet. I think Dad has the subconscious fear of time, and not being quick enough. It's a very mild form of paranoia, and one that I have too. I always stress over replying quickly when one of my friends texts me. I have a small fear that if I don't reply, I'll completely lose the conversation and be forgotten. Stupid, I know, but then again I am also guilty of worrying about my friends. One of my best friends will text me every day once he leaves school, and IF I DO NOT RECEIVE THAT TEXT, AND UP UNTIL I DO- I spaz out. I don't even know why! I will do repetitive checks for messages, check and re-check if anyone has read my message to see if anyone is ignoring me... Thank you for the inherited paranoia, Dad! I don't know if we're the only ones who do this... I'm assuming not, but I have no idea. What is your subconscious fear? Let me know in the comments. Maddie That headline is not my own. I saw it on a blog post by James Altucher. Don't worry, I am not plagiarizing his article. He was writing about something else today. The above quote was in the lower right hand corner of an image he put up about essential skills they don't teach you in college.
When I read the quote it really just struck me because of how true it is! You have to live for yourself! Not for your parents, friends, teachers, or anyone else...well, maybe your children! Growing up you need to follow your own interests and find what will work best for you...or you are never really going to be happy. Now let me be clear here, I am not saying to not do what you are asked to do. Not at all. What I am talking about is try not to repeat your parent's mistakes or choose your life's path due to what your parent's want for you. In other words, don't become a doctor, because your mother wants you to be a doctor...become a doctor because you have a driving passion to heal people! Let's take it further. Don't drink because "everyone in your family does it" or do drugs because "all of my friends do and they are fine!" Don't get a tattoo because "they are in style" or get a new car to "keep up with the Jones". Be yourself! And make your own decisions! Think! Now, I am not talking about not doing your math, Maddie because you want to think for yourself. I am talking at a level deeper than that. Do your math, and the other exercises that are necessary to learn how to think. Then apply those lessons so you can think out how best to proceed so that you can be happy in life! Last night, I read through some of my dead wife's diary from fifteen years ago. We each tried to keep one back then, but gave them up as too much trouble. I also read back through my diary for the same dates to see if there were any parallels. The most striking thing I noticed was that we both realized we had problems, but our approach to dealing with them were different. One of Sharon's largest problems was that I was trying to stop her from drinking, even though she no longer wanted to stop drinking! Page after page I read about how she kept drinking and lying to me about it. Her eating disorder was a major focus for her, my anger at her lying and her anger at me for how I handled my stress about her drinking and lying. In truth, we were a mess during the early years of our marriage. How does this relate to the theme of this post? Well, a couple of times Sharon mentions that she talked to her mom, who also seemed to be experiencing similar issues as Sharon. In fact, eerily Sharon seemed to be living out similar scenes from her Mom's life. Her mom also has some similar issues to Sharon and Sharon seemed to be mirroring her lifestyle to some extent. Sharon had addictive personality disorder. I am not saying that her mother has that also (I don't think she necessarily does). But some of Sharon's problems were learned behaviors that did not help with her underlying issues. If there is one thing that I would like to pass on to my children it is the passion and ability to think for themselves. I am raising my daughters to the best of my abilities. When they grow older I want them to think about what I did in raising them, and take the best parts to raise their own children. Things that they believe I did not do properly, or in areas where I may have failed, I want them to discard. That way things will be better for their children. To do this though, they will truly need to be able to think and discern good from bad. Live for yourselves girls, and be happy. Plagiarize someone else's life, and you may never truly find the answers that I hope you are looking for. |
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