This quote comes from the poet and author Atticus Finch (who I'd honestly love to do a quote collection post about), and I found it while looking through quotes to post underneath one of my Instagram photos. While the quote seems to be in a descriptive form of someone, I like the metaphor it aims to convey- that metaphor being that while you may have a fear of moving forward in life or making big decisions that can affect your life, it can be just as scary (if not scarier) to perpetually stay still and not move forward in life.
If you've read this blog before, you likely know that life progression is something often discussed by my dad and I. My dad endorses people setting goals and striving to reach them, while I tend to encourage people to never stop learning and choosing to learn. In any case, I like this quote because of its similarity to our own message of not being afraid to make a change in your life to strive for something you've wanted. While I'm still young to make big decisions and take chances that'll drastically affect my future, I can certainly say that I hate "staying still" or not progressing forward in my life. I'm constantly moving and constantly changing- just not in a way that'll change my near future too greatly. Obviously, my choices and changes will amount to who I am in the long run, but it's not necessarily a near-term change. Recent changes I've made to my life include a smaller friend circle, higher work-load, and more time spent volunteering at my karate school. I wasn't happy with the drama and negativity in my life, or really the people I was spending time with... so I made the change and cut back my circle of friends to people who I love and am comfortable being myself with. I'm aiming to achieve an Associate's Degree when I graduate in 2019, so obviously, my workload needed to be raised. This was a necessary change that will end up eventually shaping my future, but I sincerely believe it's for the better. Finally, I'll be testing for my Sensei title in December- a huge step for me in my karate life and something I've wanted for a long time. The extra time spent in the dojo is not only necessary for my title, but also something I love doing- while I still get a little flustered in front of large classes, I love being able to help people one-on-one and I enjoy teaching people new things that'll help their form or technique. These choices and changes are big for me, right now. In 10 years, will it matter if I cut back my friend circle? Well, maybe. Who I choose to associate myself with could have a huge impact on who I become in life. Adding extra time to focus on my education is also vital to where I'll be in 10 years... and finally, acquiring that sensei title is something that will never expire or fade away for me. While the choices I make now may pale in comparison to the choices I might make as an adult, they are in no way any less important because they are stones in the path leading to my adulthood. I am not afraid of heights... and I'm already beginning to fly. It's never too early (or too late) to make a choice, make a change, that can affect your future for the better. - Maddie
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Surprisingly, I don't think I've covered any quotes by Janis Joplin yet! I say "surprisingly" because she's among one of my favorite older artists to listen to, and in my opinion she was a phenomenal singer who died well before her time. I've decided to post this quote collection to top off my posts for the week- I'm tired and I need sleep, but I'm also dedicating this post to my dad and his recent artwork purchase. I'm sure there will be a proper post showing off the painting when it arrives, but in short, my dad found a talented foreign artist who does psychedelic paintings and he ordered a painting of Janis Joplin (among others). This inspired me to go hunting for quotes, and what follows are the quotes that I found and liked.
"Don't compromise yourself. You're all you've got." "You are what you settle for. You are only as much as you settle for." "You can destroy your now, worrying about tomorrow." "Being an intellectual creates a lot of questions and no answers. You can fill your life up with ideas and still go home lonely. All you really have that really matters are feelings. That's what music is to me.” "We don't forgive people because they deserve it. We forgive them because they need it- because we need it. We all need it." "I always wanted to be an artist, whatever that was. Like other chicks wanted to be stewardesses. I read. I painted. I thought." It's been awhile since I've posted a collection of quotes on this blog, and I think it's due time for a new set. This collection is actually inspired by a card that was sent to me awhile back by my Aunt Michelle. My aunt will often send cards to me (and my dad and sister) to check in with us, to send us recipes, or other small things. Oftentimes, these cards have cool designs on them or even good quotes. One of the cards I had received last year had a great quote on it, to the point that I actually took the card and pinned it up on a corkboard I have in my room. I recently received a few new posters for my room, and in putting them up, I re-discovered the quote. It was a Helen Keller quote, and it inspired me to go searching for more inspirational quotes. Helen Keller was an incredible woman who did plenty of amazing things throughout her life, despite being deaf, blind, and essentially mute. She graduated college and went on to become a phenomenal author and founded the ACLU. This (among many other accomplishments) earned her many recognition honors. Below is the quote that is in my room, and others that I found and loved. "Walking with a friend in the dark, is better than walking alone in the light."
"The only thing worse than being blind, is having sight without vision." "When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us." "No effort that we make to attain something beautiful is ever lost." "People don't like to think. If one thinks, one must reach a conclusion. Conclusions are not always pleasant." "A bend in the road is not the end of the road- unless you fail to make the turn." "There are no shortcuts to any place worth going." “Believe, when you are most unhappy, that there is something for you to do in the world. So long as you can sweeten another's pain, life is not in vain.” This wasn't today's original post, but after my laptop decided to do an update and destroy my original, I decided to say 'screw it' and just write a new post altogether. I'll have some new posts on the Letters next week, anyway. It didn't HAVE to get done today, I just prefer writing letters because of their unique perspective. In any case, I digress. I went onto google to find quotes about self-reflection and improvement, and instead found the above quote... however, it did inspire me and I wanted to share my thoughts on it.
My interpretation of this quote is that you should always be yourself and always seek to make yourself happy and gratified in your own life, because spending time trying to edit yourself to be an image someone else would want is rather pointless. So many of the people in your life are temporary, and even at 15 I'm already seeing this. I've gone through so many friendships that I thought would be unbreakable, and now those same people won't even glance at me when we pass on the street. It's as if we've reverted back to strangers. And in a way, I guess we have. We've both changed and grown into two uniquely different people. I could no longer tell you almost anything about the person I see, and I doubt she could tell you anything about me. That's a moot point, however, and perhaps the subject of another blog post in the future. Imagine, though, if I had centered my entire being and personality around this one friendship... only to lose it. Imagine if I had changed my lifestyle to suit this person, only for them to leave. I would've been a person who wasn't truly me... for someone no longer in my life. Once you alter yourself, it can be very hard to go back to who you were before... or back to yourself, in general. Even when the person leaves your life, the change they inspired remains.... and that change can be seen by anyone who encounters you, aside from one small detail: instead of seeing it as a change, people who didn't know you prior will take it as your true identity, and chances are that it will slowly become that if you don't recognize it in time. Now, I do know that changing for someone and not knowing how to go back to being yourself can be terrifying- you feel as if you've given up a large part of your own identity, and a loss of self-identity is horrible. I look at life through the lens that something once lost can never be re-gained. While that may sound a bit pessimistic, I see it as a chance to start over. Fresh opportunity, if you will. Instead of trying to go back to who you were, look at your lack of identity as a way to become who you were meant to be. Take the lessons you've learned, and build from them. Build, build, and keep on building until you are fully happy with the person you've become. At the end of the day, you will die for your own life. Not for anyone else's. Make sure you've lived a life worth dying for. - Maddie "Be comfortable with being uncomfortable." I am not sure who wrote this gem, but I think it is a great quote; if you look below the surface. My youngest daughter looked at this quote and told me: "See this is why I don 't read your posts. I never know what you are talking about!" Ashleigh is seven, and still takes everything she reads literally. I know some adults that do that too!
I think it is a great quote because it pertains to a fulfilled life. We don't grow if we remain in our comfort zone. In fact, we stagnate. The problem is, we all want to be comfortable. We like to avoid change which could involve second guessing ourselves in the future. Nearly everyone I know says they want to be happy. And yet, many of them don't take the steps to change things so that they are happy. Instead, they continue to do the things they have always done and complain about it instead. There are certain things that need to be done to bring about change... and that is true whether it is the pursuit of happiness, the pursuit of a relationship, or a new job. In fact, it is true for everything. First, you need to know what you want to do. By knowing what you want, I don't mean that in a vague sort of way. I mean you really need to picture it in great detail. You then need to start thinking about what it will entail to reach that goal. Make a road map so to speak. Put down every little detail of what you would have to do to accomplish your goal. For instance, if you wanted to be able to give your car a tune up, there are certain things you would have to do. First, you would need to know what supplies you would need to do it. Secondly, it would help if you actually knew how to do it. If you don't then you may have to watch someone do one first, or take a class, or even watch a you tube video. Third, you would want to make sure you have all of the tools that you will need. Next you'll need to set aside time to accomplish your task. Etc. Etc. Once you have your detailed plan, the next step is the most crucial part. You actually have to start your endeavor. So many people will make plans and then wait for the perfect moment to start their plan. Unfortunately for many, that moment never arrives. The best time to start, once you know what you want is now. Not next month, not next year, but now. Part of the beauty of have a plan with the steps necessary plainly written out is that you have broken down what you need to do in smaller steps. You have already set it in your mind that there are a number of things to be done to reach your goal, and you can start by attacking one of those small things. Starting a new thing is half of the battle! By starting small two things are accomplished. First it allows you to get comfortable with the changes you are initiating. Secondly, you see some progress right away, and hopefully that will give you enough incentive to continue. Third, you have to keep going! Don't stop until you see your plan through. Get comfortable with working towards your goal. You are moving out of your comfort zone, there will be times when you are uncertain, or tired, or scared. Keep going! If something that you are doing isn't working as expected, then modify it a bit until it does work for you! As a side note, if you are working towards a life changing event, then try to surround yourself with like-minded people. Look for people who have accomplished something similar to what you are attempting. Ask them questions. Get to know them. The worst thing you can do is surround yourself with people who tell you that you can't. If you want to do something, you usually can. There will be a trade off though. You need to be willing to give up something in exchange for the new thing. I find that the things you may need to give up come down to three categories: Time, Money, People, or a combination of the three. To write this post, I am giving up about an hour of my time. Although I am writing it during the day, I know exactly what I am cutting out to write it. I will work an hour later this evening so that my work load doesn't suffer, and I will still do karate with my daughters. Instead, I will read a few less articles on stumble upon tonight and I will keep off of Facebook and Stumble upon. All said, if you embrace change and try to effect the changes you want to see, I think you will find you will begin to become comfortable with being uncomfortable. This quote is such a honest metaphor for people who refuse to make progress in their life. I see examples of this everywhere in my life... friends claiming they've made progress toward becoming a better and healthier person when they've only taken one step and then stayed in place, people saying they're going to strive towards goals and then refusing to push themselves and progress... everyone says they'll try for something, but then they get comfortable with where they are and stop pushing themselves to go further.
I've always been taught that you are never too old to stop learning new things, and that you're never too old to stop trying. When I say I'm going to change, I throw everything I have into it... and I try to not quit until I've reached my goal. That's why I've climbed Mt. Monadnock 5 times now. That's why my lowest grade is a 95. That's why I'm a second degree black belt. Speaking of karate, karate is a perfect example of this "phenomenon". So many people take karate until they reach black belt... and then feel validated to drop out. They've attained their goal, so it no longer matters or is important to them. They leave and then saunter about for the rest of their days claiming they're a black belt. There are people who have been gone for years who still say they are, though they haven't practiced or came to class in ages... and while this doesn't deprive them of the title they fought to earn, it does deprive them of the application, fitness, and knowledge that they gained from their training. It's so sad to see people's talent go to waste. At the end of the day, this quote is telling you to shoot for your goals and to follow through with them. Don't reach a milestone and get comfortable or quit... because the moment you do, you're giving up on your goal in its entirety. Sure, you may not be as bad as you were before- but you still aren't where you set out to be. It's like climbing a mountain, and then getting halfway up and deciding to build a house and live there instead of actually completing the hike. Shoot for your goals, and finish them. Even the smallest of steps count, so long as they are in the right direction. - Maddie This is one of the quotes from Jim Morrison that I mentioned in yesterday's post. Today, I wanted to go over it in a bit more depth.
I think Morrison was referencing a way of thinking about life, or a certain perception- that your future is never guaranteed, therefore it's always uncertain. However, an end (while still uncertain, yes) can come at any time without warning... so it always seems far nearer than the hypothetical future. It's an interesting quote, if you re-read it a few times and take the time to genuinely think it through. I was taught from a very young age that the future is uncertain. In fact, one of the best lessons my dad has ever taught me is to never go to bed upset with someone, because you never know if either of you (or the world in and of itself) will make it through the night. The end is always near. There's no guarantee that tomorrow will ever come. I've carried this lesson with me through life, and it has led me to how I tend to think today... about not taking moments for granted and living in the moment and accepting life as what it is. If you go back to my post about my 5 life mottos, I actually talked briefly about how worrying about the future is pointless because it's not even guaranteed... and that worry can only result in you overthinking the future situation and making things worse for yourself. That aside, regretting the past is just as pointless because it can't be changed. I really think a lot of people have a hard time accepting that, and it's sad. In any case, I've strewn a bit from the quote I started with... but I think I've made my point. - Maddie I'm not really in a mood to write today- I was up late last night with a friend and a lot has gone on so I'm going to fall back on my old writing habit of posting a collection of quotes. I apologize sincerely for not writing my own thoughts to back them... I promise I'll be back to writing my usual posts tomorrow. In any case, today's quotes come from Jim Morrison, who was the lead singer of The Doors. If you didn't know who he was or if you don't know The Doors, I encourage you to look them up and listen to some of their music. It's really good.
Without further ado, here are some quotes. "The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are. You trade in your reality for a role. You trade in your sense for an act. You give up your ability to feel, and in exchange, put on a mask. There can't be any large-scale revolution until there's a personal revolution, on an individual level. It's got to happen inside first.” “Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.” “The future is uncertain but the end is always near.” "You feel your strength in the experience of pain." "Whoever controls the media, controls the mind." “I've noticed that when people are joking they're usually dead serious, and when they're serious, they're usually pretty funny.” “People fear death even more than pain. It's strange that they fear death. Life hurts a lot more than death. At the point of death, the pain is over." "You must be the change that you wish to see in the world." That is a quote by Mahatma Gandhi. It's a nice thought, but not really realistic. For example, I would like the world to change so that there are no wars. All of my life, I have not become a soldier, have not supported any of the war efforts and certainly haven't clamored for war, and yet, there is war, In fact, the only thing that has kept me from getting caught up in a war is the luck of having been born in North America, which has basically been war free over the past 100 years or so. In fact, to get to a war zone, I would actually have to travel to another continent.
On a very personal level, I guess his phrase could be true in some instances. Dieting comes to mind. Looking for a new job... that sort of thing. But certainly not anything that involves the world at large. So how do we affect change in the world around us? I think it is by realizing that nothing happens on a worldwide scale instantaneously. Little by little, things can change. It may take decades, however! Think, if each person who truly wants peace teaches their children that peace does not mean war elsewhere, and encourages them to not choose the military as an option, at some point the idea may gain traction. Instead of glorifying war through movies and books and dehumanizing our political enemies, we should show our children the true costs of war. Show them the children who have lost their fathers. The men and women who have lost limbs or their mental stability. Introduce them to people who are different than they are. Allow them to experience new cultures by meeting recent immigrants. Change on a global scale is slow, but it can be accomplished And, in the end, it does really start with the individual. So, was Gandhi wrong when he said that you must be the change you want to see in the world? No, he was correct. He just failed to mention that the change you want to see just may not happen during your lifetime. "Beware of false knowledge; it is more dangerous than ignorance." That's a quote by George Bernard Shaw. I have written about George before, so I won't bore you with a paragraph about who he is. If you don't know who he is, a quick google of his name will give you more info on him than I would have wrote here anyway.
I have thought about this quote for quite a bit, and all I will say is that it is correct more than its wrong. If you don't know something, it can hurt you. You may not know that it is hurting you, but it ultimately can. Even so, false knowledge is worse because you fully believe that it is correct and actively work towards using that knowledge for your own benefit. That is where the problem lies. Because the knowledge is false, you do not realize that you are working your way closer and closer to a fall, and putting more and more of your time and effort into a losing proposition. I find that when I am uncertain about something, I go more slowly and look for pitfalls. Meanwhile, when I believe I know how to do something correctly, I work more quickly and more or less just look for the positive outcome. This is probably a poor example, but think about driving your car down the roadway. The road may be wet, but has not turned icy where you are, so you expect that it will also not be icy ahead. The air just isn't cold enough to make or icy spots, you believe. Meanwhile, up ahead, the road goes up in elevation and the roadway crosses a short bridge over a small stream or river. The wind has been blowing water up onto the roadway slowly and the wind is passing both over and under the roadway. Black ice develops, and all of a sudden your knowledge of a wet but not icy road is incorrect. Your speed, which was fine on the wet but warm roadway is now much too fast to be safe. With any luck, you will make it over the black ice without losing control. Unfortunately, not everyone knows how to react to a slippery roadway. Think about the massive pile ups you see on TV about the people who live in the south when it gets below freezing down there. It doesn't happen often, so they are not used to driving in slippery conditions. Then bang! All of a sudden they are seeing thirty-car pile ups. Their lack of experience on an icy roadway leads to property damage and injuries. Now that I think of it, this is likely an example of both false knowledge and ignorance! A better example might be when a boy who gets an "A" on a test in an earlier class, gives his answer to his friend who is taking the class later in the day. Since he has what he believes are the right answers, he doesn't bother to do any last minute studying. Meanwhile, the teacher has also changed the order of the questions on the test so that the boys answers are no longer valid. Without the friends help, the boy might have passed the test. Instead, he relies on his friend's answers and fails the test. His false knowledge of his friend's good result, and list of correct answers ended up being worse for him, than if he jut relied on his own answers. His ignorance may have been enough to get him a passing grade. Meanwhile, his false knowledge led to his failure. At any rate, I guess the moral of this story is to always do your best to verify the knowledge you are given, and always be open to learning. Ignorance is not bliss, and knowledge that is assumed rather than investigated can be dangerous. Use your brains and do your best to verify the knowledge you are given. In honor of New Years being upon us in a few days, I think I'll give you all some quotes about change. New Years seems to mark the time that everyone decides to start changing themselves. Everyone resolves to start a diet, or to stop drinking, or to start exercising, or some such bullshit. Some people even make efforts to change their mindsets- and hey, if you want to try to change and need a set day to do it, more power to you. Good luck and all that. I personally don't believe that change needs a marker- if you're going to change, don't put it off waiting for a set date. Anyway, that's just me. Here are some quotes. Happy New Years folks.
"Be the change you wish to see in the world." "Everyone thinks of changing the world, but nobody thinks of changing himself." “Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.” “Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” “They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.” “Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don't.” “Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.” “This is a new year. A new beginning. And things will change.” I know that I added this quote to my last post, but I wanted to take this post to say that I disagree with it entirely. Not only do I not see Christmas as a necessity- but I do think that we're here for ourselves! I mean, think about it- the human race has developed into the most advanced (known) race and it's all for the sake of self-preservation and making things easier for ourselves. If it weren't for trying to make our own benefits, we wouldn't have progressed this far at all!
Secondly, if we really want to go with the theory that we need a day to remind us that we're here for "something other than ourselves", then it shouldn't be Christmas! If our moral code is THAT important, then we should be applying it all the time... not just on certain days. On top of this, we shouldn't need to be reminded of something if it's that important. Christmas is not and has never been a necessity for me. I've said it in previous posts, but it's just a source of stress and sadness at this rate. I'd rather just spend the day relaxing with those I love... which hopefully will be a reality this year. Previously, it has only really brought ,me stress. Throughout the rest of the year, I try to live a life of peace and happiness. Christmas is advertised as such- but I feel that people throw themselves too much into things and forget to uphold these "morals" for the rest of the year. I don't know. Maybe I've just over-thought this quote, as well. I'll leave that for you to decide. - Maddie “Growing apart doesn't change the fact that for a long time we grew side by side; our roots will always be tangled. I'm glad for that.” I came across the above quote while reading online, and I figured I'd write about it today because it set off a lot of thoughts in my mind. First, I'd like to go over my interpretation of the quote. I read it as a metaphor for friendship, and how it can change over time... how you may drift from someone, but it doesn't change the past or the memories you've already made with them. In a way, the quote is trying to say that this ties you to that person forever... but I disagree.
Maybe I'm just disagreeing because the prospect of being tied to someone forever is terrifying... albeit through memories. But while that is the case, there are a few other things I'd like to bring up. Having memories with someone doesn't tie you to them forever. It just means that they were a part of your life at some point, and while yes; you can't change that- it doesn't mean that you have to be tied to them forever. I certainly know that I have memories with people who I'd never wish to be tied to ever again. Unlike the quote, I can safely say that the people who have drifted from me have drifted for a reason- and I'm glad that I'm NOT tied to them anymore. If people are in my past, they are there for a reason. Had I wanted any ties to them, I either wouldn't have cut communications or I would've made an effort to keep them in my life. If you are no longer in my life, it is because I do not want you here. In the end, I think this quote was entirely wrong- both in saying that you're glad to have ties with people who are no longer in your life, and in saying that memories tie you together forever. The only thing that can tie two people together is the desire to have a bond- nothing else. Friendship is a two way street, my friends- make sure you keep your end of the street clean. "The mind is everything. What you think, you become." That's a quote by Buddha. To a certain extent, he is right. You do have the potential to become whatever you think. It takes more than thinking, though. The thinking needs to be followed up with concise actions toward your goals.
When I was a child, I wanted to be an archeologist. I found the past very interesting and always though that digging up a treasure or a dinasaur would be really cool. As I grew older, I didn't think that there would be enough money in archeology, though, to raise a family or do other things away from archeology, so I looked for a career where I could make good money and have the time to raise a family. I decided on a career in finance, and the rest is history. I never pursued classes in history or hobbies where I could go on archeological digs. I did take classes in finance, and look for jobs where I could gain experience to work as a stock analyst. And so as I thought and acted, so I became. Even so, I think Buddha was talking at a deeper level. I really don't think he had careers in mind when he threw out that quote. I think he was talking about the full human experieince. Think peaceful thoughts, and you would inevitably become a peaceful person. Think evil thoughts, and you had a greater chance of becoming evil. What mattered to Buddha is what you are as a person and what you become... Not careerwise, possibly not even in this lifetime... but for all time. Buddha was concerned with Nirvana. Nirvana is "a transcendent state in which there is neither suffering, desire, nor sense of self, and the subject is released from the effects of karma and the cycle of death and rebirth." It represents the final goal of Buddhism. I don't know about you, but I am far from a state of Nirvana. Pleasure, pain, happiness, sadness... I expereince all of those emotions, and more, on a nearly daily basis. I want happiness for my children, and I want the end of sorrows. Not just my own, but everyones. Although I have meditated in the past, I meditated to explore my mind. If I had reached Nirvana, it would have been to marvel at it and the incredible feeling it must (in my mind back then) bring about. By thinking that Nirvana was a buzz or a trip, I nearly guaranteed that I would never experience true Nirvana, no matter how much I meditated! Now, although I know what Nirvana is truly supposed to be, I don't try to attain it. I am not ready for it. Instead, I want my girls to experience life, and enjoy it. I want them to be happy and avoid as many pains as I can help them to avoid. I want them to learn ... and love learning. Instead, of wishing Nirvana for them, I want them to be, and experieince all that life has to offer them. I want them to live on their own terms. The mind IS a beautiful thing. Think and you will become. I thought, I think, and I became. I shouldn't ask for anything else. But I do! “Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?” That's a quote by Charles Bukowski. I thought of it when I saw the picture of the sculpture that was at one of the Burning Man festivals. Although the quote isn't an exact match for the image, it is what I thought of.
Bukowski, by the way, was an American author and poet. He had a long career, and had a lot of his poetry published during his lifetime. I can't point to any one work that he is best known for. I guess Post Office would be it though. Meanwhile, the sculpture is by Aleksandr Milov from the Ukraine. At least that is what the picture credit says... that might be the photographer for all I know. Either way, I think the sculpture is very expressive. When I was young, I looked at things as a child. All my thoughts and dreams were idylic. I saw the good without the bad, and the how of a matter never entered my mind. Imagining my future as a house with a white picket fence, a beautiful wife greeting me at the door and a huge smile on my face, wasn't too far from how I was picturing my future. As I grew, the picture expanded to include a job I actually enjoyed and a train ride daily that was pleasant and allowed me to look at beautiful scenery. It didn't phase me that the scenery outside the train window was already bleak, and that I would later be riding right by that same scenery. My mind never made the leap. As I got older, the reality of life started to sink in. I had a nice house, but I had to work hard and spend lots to get it how I wanted. I had a beautiful wife, but she had problems that affected our relationship. To say that my life wasn't going exactly as planned was an understatement. I remembered who I was before the world changed me, though, and began to make changes to make myself become whole. We moved to another nice house in a beautiful state. My wife continued to try and battle her demons. When I stepped outside the house, I had the beauty that I always dreamed of. For a few minutes each day, I had the dream! A lot happened in the next eight years that changed my life forever. A divorce, a failed business, and my wife's early demise all hammered at me. Meanwhile, my daughters and I were making do and slowly recovering from the negatives. My life is slowly merging back towards who I was. I now remember who I was, and I am working my way back towards him. My honor is intact, and I am doing my best to be who I need to be. The world will just have to accept me for who I am. So who am I? I am a loving father for my daughters. I am a martial artist. I am a thinker, and a lover of beauty. Time is a precious gift, and I am looking to give my time to my daughters. What I write on this blog is for them. Hopefully, they can learn something from my thoughts, and never forget who they are, or what they want to be. Stay true to yourselves, and you will be happier. "Turn your face toward the sun, and the shadows will fall behind you." This is a Maori proverb about staying optimistic. I think Rihanna may have used it in one of her songs as well, but I think it was a proverb long before she sang about it.
Evil is said to lurk in the shadows, and many people seem to have a superstitious dread of them. As the proverb says, if you are facing the sun, you will never see the shadows. They are still there, you just won't see them. I don't think optimists are not aware of the problems around them. Instead, I think they just choose to focus on the positives that surround them. Oftentimes, by focusing on the positives in any situation, you can sometimes find the solution for the negatives. I guess the easiest way to explain it is thatt if you are constantly looking at why something won't work, you are less likely to see how it can work. For me, I like to look at both. Any time I see something that isn't working for me, I try to look for the solution, instead of complaining about the problem. If the solution I choose doesn't work, I then try to find out if it needs modifying or if I need to scrap it altogether. All said, I think looking towards the sun is a great way to say stay optimistic. Life can be beautiful. If you are always focused on the sad or the bad, it makes it very hard to see the good. Step out into the light and let the shadows fall behind you. “You are not stuck where you are unless you decide to be.” That's a quote by Dr. Wayne Dyer. I think this self-help guru was absolutely right about this one!
I here so many people say they hate their job or they hate the area where they live. I tell them, "then find a new job." or "Then move!" Well, you wouldn't believe the responses I get to that. Well, I wouldn't make as much money somewhere else... or all of my family is around here. Well, then don't complain! If you are not happy where you are or in what you are doing, then it is up to you to change it. So many people are afraid of moving away from what they know... or move out of their comfort zones. I know, because it happens to me too. We get comfortable, and even though we know in our hearts that there is a better way or a better place for us, we get comfortable with the status quo and get afraid to try. In the past, I have run my own business. I loved being my own boss, but circumstances changed in my life, and I went back to a corporate job to make my life easier and to get a consistent paycheck. Even so, not a day goes by where I don't either look for a new business to start. I know that for me to be happy, I need to be running my life... not just in the hours between 5:00 p.m. and 7:00 a.m., but all the time. If you are not happy with something in your life, then you need to make a decision and act on it. Everything does not have to change in a day, but you do need to take at least a small step in that direction each and every day. Life is short. Don't be miserable because you are too afraid to take action. Remember, not taking action is an action in and of itself. It is a negative action, though. Tomorrow, take a step back and look at where you are in your life. Try to find the areas where you are not happy and then take steps to change them. Even little steps involving just looking for alternatives to the things that make you unhappy, will make you feel a bit better. Look for opportunities that will lead to your long-term happiness, and then take actions to make those opportunities a reality. Rome wasn't built in a day! But remember, Rome never would have been built at all if someone hadn't taken those original steps necessary to begin it. Be happy. And take the steps necessary to become happier "Wisdom comes from paying attention to wise people." That's a quote by Yamamoto Tsunetomo. Tsunetomo was a samurai in the late 1600's and early 1700's. I somewhat disagree with this statement. To me, wisdom comes from experience. While you can learn a lot from paying attention to wise people, these people also had to learn.
Pay attention to everything, but especially wise people, would seem to be a better quote to me. There is so much you can learn every day, if you just open yourself to it. Everyone has something that they can teach you. Whether it is how to act or how not to act in any given situation, you can definitely learn something. One thing that I like to do, but don't get a chance to do a lot, is to have conversations with older people that I don't know to see what makes them tick. I have learned so many life lessons in that way in the past! You would be amazed at the range of topics that will come up, if you just open yourself to listening to other people and ask open-ended questions. Reading is also a great way to learn and gain wisdom. Take old Yamamoto here, for instance. I originally saw only the one quote by him, but in knowing that he was a samurai, I looked him up and found that he had written an entire book of his thoughts on the warrior code... or bushido as we call it now. His book was: Hagakure: "The Book Of The Samurai" Below are some other quotes from that book. What I learned from looking at that book is that Tsunetomo was likely a bit of a psychopath! Below are some of his wiser sayings... I have left out the ones that lament about how men no longer want to behead prisoners with their hands tied behind their backs! Oy! "There is certainly nothing more important in life than what we do at the present moment. A person’s entire life consists of nothing more than one moment piled on top of another, over and over again. Once enlightened to this, the warrior has nothing else to worry about, because he realizes that he has only to live in the present moment with the utmost intensity." "A man’s life is only a vapor that vanishes in an instant. One should spend his life doing that which he enjoys. As short as life is, it is foolish to spend it doing only the things one hates." "The secret to a happy marriage is this: Treat your spouse all of your life as you did when you first met and there will never be room for discord." All said, I agree with the last two quotes wholeheartedly. For the record, after Tsunetomo actually gave up being a samurai after his original Lord died. He did not like the man who took over, and instead of serving someone he did not agree with, he went into the mountains and became a monk. His book was written by another samurai who went into the mountains to find him and learn from him. Learn wisdom from wise people, but also read and learn from the words of wise people who you have not met. Everyone has something that they can teach you. Just be open to the lessons you can learn. Some things are more precious because they don't last long... this is a quote that some of you may recognize if you read my last blog post. It comes from the book The Picture of Dorian Gray (a great book, if you haven't read it) and I'd like to talk about it for a little bit in this post. My dad commented on how I seldom give my thoughts on quotes anymore- but that in and of itself is a post for another day. Today, I'd rather appease him and give my thoughts on this quote; since it did spark a chain of thoughts in my head.
My response to this quote is- what of the things we think will last? I don't think this quote is incorrect in the message that it is trying to deliver, but I do think that it is lacking. Sometimes, we don't know if something is important until it has happened, or until it is too late. We don't know when things are precious, oftentimes until it's too late and the appreciation is lost in sorrow and regret. I know that the quote doesn't state that the person knows the moment won't last long- but I'm taking it that way because I don't think that looking back on the past... you can make a moment precious. If a moment is precious, it is because it is so in the moment. You can't recreate and redesign moments to your own liking once they've happened, you can only wistfully look back and APPRECIATE what once was. Perhaps that in and of itself is precious... but not the memory itself. A good example of this is my mother. I don't think any of us truly expected her to die at such a young age, despite her illness. Looking back on my memories with her? None of them are any more precious because of her death. If anything, remembering is more painful for me than anything else... what I'm trying to say is that the one way to combat regret for lost time is to live in the moment. Be happy with each day as it comes. Stop regretting what you can't change about the past and worrying about the possibilities that tomorrow holds- it isn't here yet, and you can handle it as it comes. It'll spare you a lot of lost appreciation for life- I promise. - Maddie Growing up homeschooled, I found myself subjected to plenty of book reports and creative writing assignments from my dad. Of these assignments, one I remember in particular was my assignment for the book The Picture Of Dorian Gray. I had to write a story that reflected it and was similar to it, yet different. It was extremely fun for me and I enjoyed both writing the story and reading the book. If you haven't read the book- I highly recommend it. It's a classic and a great story, if you can find the one lying beneath it.
Hell, even if you have read the book before, now may be a good time to revisit it. I always find that I can pull new things from books each time I read them, so maybe you'll gain a new interpretation in doing so. In any case, here are a few of my favorite quotes from that book. “The books that the world calls immoral are books that show the world its own shame.” “Experience is merely the name men gave to their mistakes.” “Those who find ugly meanings in beautiful things are corrupt without being charming. This is a fault. Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things are the cultivated. For these there is hope. They are the elect to whom beautiful things mean only Beauty. There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written, or badly written. That is all.” “To define is to limit.” “Nowadays people know the price of everything and the value of nothing.” “Behind every exquisite thing that existed, there was something tragic.” “When one is in love, one always begins by deceiving one's self, and one always ends by deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance.” “Children begin by loving their parents; as they grow older they judge them; sometimes they forgive them.” “Nowadays most people die of a sort of creeping common sense, and discover when it is too late that the only things one never regrets are one's mistakes.” “Nothing can cure the soul but the senses, just as nothing can cure the senses but the soul.” “Some things are more precious because they don't last long.” |
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