Thinking of an old David Bowie song with my title...just in case you want to hum it! Anyway, one thing I have noticed that took me a while to learn is that no matter how fast we move, change is slow. Examples? you might ask. Well to start, my wife's descent into death was a slow-motion train wreck. She was arrested for drunk driving when she first got pregnant with Ashleigh. While our lives saw an immediate impact, it took nearly another four years before she drank herself to death. My life went from bad to worse and it was nearly six years before my life really started to turn back around. Will it ever get back to pre-crisis normal? I don't know. I don't think so.
It's ok, too, that it won't go back to pre-crisis normal. My experiences have changed me and my new normal won't be worse than the pre-crisis normal...just different. I was thinking about my future last night and I realized that I will likely be in my mid to upper sixties before my youngest daughter is out of college. What will I do then? Hopefully, be a great grandfather for my daughters' children. I meant a "great" grandfather by the way...not great grandfather. The transition from father to grandfather will be interesting. I will always, for the rest of my days be a father. A grandfather, I think, will just be an extension of being a father. It will be fun to watch my daughters raise their children. What things will they do differently than me? What things will be the same? I tried to take all of the positive things from when I was growing up and continue them. Meanwhile, I tried to discard the things that bothered me when I was a kid. Even so, I sometimes see those things creep into my actions on occasion. Change is slow...and sometimes generational. As for my personal life? Changes outside of my family are glacial. Karate has moved to only two times a week, which is dull. I am slowly cleaning out the basement to get my own dojo back into workout shape. I am looking forward to practicing down there with both of my daughters. Otherwise, I just don't go out enough to see any changes in my personal situation. At the moment, I am content with the slow change happening around me.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Archives
September 2021
Categories
All
|