"In spite of illness, in spite even of the archenemy sorrow, one can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways." That mouthful was by Edith Wharton. And although it seems to be a long run-on sentence, I love that she got it exactly right, in my opinion!
Edith Wharton was an American writer who wrote "The Age Of Innocence" among other things. She actually became the first woman to win a Pulitzer prize (in 1921) due to this book. In my opinion, Wharton was a woman ahead of her time. Amazingly, she did not publish her first novel until she was 40! By the time she passed away, in 1937 she had written fifteen novels, seven novellas, and eighty-five short stories. She had published poetry, books on design, travel, literary and cultural criticism, as well as a memoir. Getting back to her quote, I like that she defines living by what she does and not by what she has. Illness and sorrow are facts of life in everyone's lives. She does not allow them to define her, however. Instead, she defines her life by her reasons for living! Ms. Wharton was not afraid of change. Her first husband had a mental illness that led to a radical change in how she had wanted to live her life. She tried to make the best of it, but after 28 years, once the doctors said that their was no longer hope to change his condition, she left to start her second life. She was 51 years old at this point! She traveled, wrote, and learned... She became happy in spite of what had happened during the "best" years of her life. I have often quoted Spock (who was likely quoting someone else) that the only constant is change. Edith is so right in saying not to be afraid of change. Not all change is bad... it is just different to what you are used to. Embrace the change, and make it your own. Always be open to learning new things. Nothing is sadder than seeing a person who decides that they know enough, and actively decides to no longer learn new things. We have all heard the saying "life has passed her by." Don't let this happen to you! Technological change has been happening at a rapid pace for over 75 years. If you fail to embrace this change, you are setting yourself up for a pretty rough go of things. Imagine if you still had to get around by horse and buggy... simply because you didn't want to learn how to drive a car! Look for small changes you can make in your life every day, and try them. The things you don't find useful, discard. Those things that show a definite benefit to you should be added to your life. Finally, find happiness in small ways. Don't look for what is wrong with your friends and family members, but what is right with them! Look for those small things that make them unique, and make you happy. It is easy to find fault in others. Constantly pointing it out doesn't make you superior, or happy. It makes you a nag. Be a person that inspires others, not the type that repels them. Remember, people are led by example, not by nagging or coercion. People in glass houses should not throw stones. And finally, remember what Jesus said to the Pharisees when they brought an adulterer to him and asked whether she should be stoned to death. He said: “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her” Before you cast guilt on another, think about what Jesus was trying to say in the above verse. Then honestly answer these two questions: "Do I live my faith? Or "Do I use it as a shield to protect me from what I disagree with?" I know I have drifted a bit away from the spirit of the above quote, but this post is meant for two people in my life... not just one. Because there is a second side to the coin, and an additional lesson, which again, can be found in the bible. This answer can be found in Proverbs. The question is how should you react to a person who may have strayed away from living their faith? The Proverbs make it clear: "Answer not a fool according to his folly, lest you also be like to him..." Take this post for what it's worth. I think there are many lessons here. Both from the original quote, and from the verses I have quoted above. I think the two I am speaking to in the final four paragraphs should be able to recognize themselves from the described behavior. If not, feel free to ask me, and I will tell you whether I was thinking of you or not. Finally, if I was not speaking to you, yet you feel the need to ask me, then what is important is that you thought I was speaking to you, and thus you need to change your behavior. Have a good night, folks.
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