"Reality is an illusion, albeit a persistent one!" Okay, who said that one Einstein? I am not going to tell you. You'll just have to figure it out for yourself. I am in a weird mood tonight so I thought I'd talk about reality.
When talking about reality, it's best to find out who's reality you are talking about so that there aren't any mistakes. My reality is much different than my mother's or my daughters' for that matter. In fact, your reality is also much different than mine. Yet we all pretend to be living in the same reality. Think of the reality of a five-year-old girl. Her reality is very limited. The extent of her knowledge is very small still, thus her ability to think about her options is limited. My daughter's reality is that I am here for her, as is her grandmother and her sister. The dog is a nice distraction, as is karate and cartoons. She loves to play, and everyone she meets is a friend. Her reality is one of happiness and love...and about an hour a day when she is learning to read and do math. Karate is something she does for fun, and when she gets better at it, her friends Hanshi and Shihan gives her a new belt. Trips to the dojo are fun, and an adventure. If she's lucky, she gets a treat from Mc Donald's on the way home. Her Grandma, sister and Daddy all love her, and she knows she loves them. Yet she doesn't really know what love is. It is a word that can be used for many feelings. She loves cookies and cheese, and her toys too. She also loves nearly everyone she meets and she believes they all love her as well. And, in a way, they do. Likely in the same way she means she loves them. My daughter Maddie's reality is more varied. The horizons are further off and not filled with the wonder of Ashleigh's. While things can still be new and exciting for her, they are fewer and farther between than when she was younger. Not everyone is a friend in Maddie's world. Some just can't be trusted. Those she trusts, she trusts with her whole heart, and it hurts her if she then finds out that they can't be trusted. Her reality is one of conflicting emotions, logic and hope. It is a mix of the physical, the spiritual and the soul. Like Ashleigh's it is still evolving. Her reality would not be recognizable by her sister. Not yet anyway. Karate is also a part of Maddie's life. it is a place to be social, a place to learn and to test herself. A place where, she too, is tested. Maddie is now at a stage where reality is changing for her on a nearly daily basis. While some things are constant, oftentimes she doesn't see the consistency and is swept away in her ever-changing reality. Relax munchkin. Some things will never change, even if you want them to. A father's love will always be there for you. To help you through your tough times. A grandmother's and sister's love will also always be there. Explore your world. See what works...and what doesn't. See how you can best view, and shape your reality. Be patient. It gets easier. Look for the good, and you will find it. Don't settle for less than what you want. Use logic to help shape the reality you want. My reality is different than either of my daughters'. To steal a quote from Alan Watts, "I have realized that the past and future are real illusions, that they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is." I sometimes feel that half my waking hours I live in the past (memories). Thoughts of my wife, thoughts of things I've done. Memories both happy and sad. And each day, I try to fill my head with new memories. Happy ones to replace sadness. My morning hugs from my daughters, A moment of conversation with Maddie, playing with Ashleigh or having her jump on my back as we watch a video. These are my reality. What drives me to do everything else. A hard workout at karate, a new technique, a joke among friends. When I am away from my computer I live! Yet I work from my computer to allow that lifestyle. Reality needs balance, and I have yet to catch my balance fully since my wife's death. I live in my head. And yet I live in the physical world too. The action and the reality are where the two worlds collide. Reality for me now is like a comfortable couch, with a tiny cheese grater attached to it somewhere. It's comfy until you move and then you get the cosmic scrape. learn to move without the grater ripping into your soul, and life can be good. I find the memories sometimes have razors, though, so you have to be careful what you remember and when. There enough for one night. I am going to have to remember not to play hippy music when I sit down to write. Because for me, what a long strange trip this post has been! Take what you can from it.
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