The way is not in the sky, it is in our heart. Above is one of the best pictures I have ever took. I was at the top of Pack Monadnock, looking out over the valley, and feeling very peaceful. I liked the way the clouds were casting shadows on the ground and decided to snap the picture. Usually, I am a horrible photographer, but this time, I think I really caught the peacefulness of the view. I like to look at that pic when I am feeling sad. I used to have it up on my computer as the wallpaper, but somehow it is no longer serving that function. I actually had to go look for it. Sometimes I feel down, and I don't know why. Like tonight, for instance. I had a very productive day and got a lot of work done. I was feeling pretty good most of the day, and shut down my computer with no intentions of working a bit later. It's rare that I do that. Usually, I jump on again after 9:30 and get a little extra work done... either because I wanted to get a little bit done ahead of what I was going to do tomorrow or, to be honest, just because I like to take my time while I work and work my own hours. Tonight I had no plans to do that though. I figured I would just relax. We have a lot of artwork up on our walls around my house. My wife and I used to go to auctions and antique shops on the weekend and to little artsy fartsy towns in rural New Jersey and Pennsylvania. Oftentimes, we would see artists drawing pictures of people in charcoal. On occasion, we would contact the artists and commission them to do charcoals for us. We would even hire artists from their websites to draw pictures for us. They now hang all over our house. Unfortunately, all of them hold memories for me. Sometimes, they are memories that usually don't necessarily attach directly to the picture. That's what happened tonight. I walked past one of the drawings, had a memory about what my wife and I were doing around that time, and boom, suddenly I was in the dumps. The above quote only loosely ties in to my post tonight. The sadness is in my heart, and yet the quiet, peaceful moment I am seeking is epitomized by the picture of the sky. The picture, is peaceful, but where I need peace is in my soul. The way to peace is through my heart, and yet, when I look at that picture, I remember the peacefulness of that moment. Memories are like a double-edged sword. They can cut both ways. At one moment, they can bring amusement or joy. At others, they can remind you of things that can never be again. Life is meant for the living, and yet so many times I look back to the dead. I think I like that picture of the sky so much because it is like looking at the future. Not the future that will be...but the future that can be. Hope rides in the air currents.
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