"We can change what we do, but not who we are." That is a quote from me! Well, I thought it was mine, but it seems two others have thought about it before. At least I found two other references to that quote on the internet. One was on a review to a Kanye West album on some obscure rap website and the other was by a Presbyterian minister on his local website in Jackson Mississippi. An no, I had never read either website before. So it is a quote by me, that happened to be used by two other people but on different subjects. I doubt you would be able to find Wikipedia articles on any of us, so don't bother trying.
If any of you have the time, feel free to put up a Wikipedia piece on me... just try to keep it accurate. That thought kind of reminds me of the movie Full Metal Jacket. There is a scene in that movie where a soldier is being interviewed by a TV reporter and he says that he joined the army because he wanted to be the first boy on his block with a confirmed kill. What craziness. Well, I guess I want to be the first person on my block with a confirmed Wikipedia listing! Anyway, it was after thinking about my last post that made me think about the above quote. When I was younger, I drank heavily and liked to "party". A lot of what I did revolved around drinking, getting a buzz and hanging around places where other people were doing the same thing. Travelling to a city I really knew nothing about to party with people I didn't know seemed exciting... not stupid. Nowadays, when I go to a new city (and its not for business), I am looking for interesting things to visit, and if i meet interesting people along the way, all the better. I am not looking to meet drunks, or partiers though. Instead, I want to meet people with interesting stories or interesting knowledge that they can share. I guess I am the same. Even back when I was just looking to get a buzz, I wanted to be surrounded by interesting people. I wanted to learn new things and get a buzz while doing it. Now, I still want to meet interesting people and learn new things... I have grown, though, and no longer need to chase a buzz to enjoy these different things. The more I look back, the more I see that my drinking was more of a way to break away from the every day and push the frontiers of my mind. Unfortunately, I got trapped into that lifestyle and IT became my regular way of spending the weekend, or an off night etc. With age comes wisdom. For those of us who learned, we still enjoy each other's company, but alcohol and other substances play no part in our lives. For others, my wife, my cousin, my good friend Tommy, they never learned that the substance wasn't necessary... and it killed them. Addiction is a horrible condition and the best way to beat it is to not start testing it. Although there are not a lot of things that I regret about my life, the few that I do, in one way or another inevitably involve alcohol. On the one hand, I have many good friends who I first met while partying and became friends with after we went partying. I have no regrets about meeting these people and adding them to my life. I do regret that I could not do those things back then without the alcohol to make it easier. In essence, I have changed what I do, but I remain who I am. I still find the same things funny, or interesting, I still have the same kinds of thoughts and I still like to do the same things. I am now just able to do them easily, no even easier, without alcohol. I still like to go see bands, walk a quiet trail and go to places I have not been before. Shop for antiques and have quiet, deep conversations. I do them sober now and share them with my daughters. I have changed, yet I am who I am! Who would have thunk it!
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